Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 25 April 2013

25 April 2013

Well, yes, LIAM HEEEEEEAARRRRRRRRNNNNN, but that's no good if no bugger can get the ball to him.

We are only halfway through this play-off semi-final, of course, and given Town's excellent away record this season the tie remains very much alive. However, your original/regular Diary has today been considering the possibility that our heroes will progress no further.

And I've never really understood this "Town have to get out of this league this season" thing. If Town get promoted I will be happy because they're my team: I like it when my team wins and I like it even more when they get promoted. If Town don't get promoted I will be disappointed because we were top of the league for a while and stuff. But I'll still go and watch them next season, whether they get promoted or not.

There's the commonly heard argument that the Conference Premier is a shit league. (Or indeed a "TINTOP" league, as one Town fan memorably described it on Twitter a few weeks ago.) The referees are terrible, people say. And some of the other teams have quite small grounds, or something, with pitches that get waterlogged when it rains.

Well, that may well be the case. But these were all complaints that we heard just as regularly back in the fourth division. For Gateshead's pitch, read Rochdale's pitch. For last night's dodgy free kick, which might keep us in the Conference, read the handball by Lincoln City's Chris Herd at Blundell Park in February 2010, right in front of referee Mark Haywood, who should have given a penalty which might have kept us in the Football League. And so on.

True, there's the club's financial position to consider. When he last year persuaded the Mariners Trust to give him a load of shares for free, it was on the promise that Flagsmasher Fenty would continue to fund the club until the end of the 2012-13 season. So if Town don't go up, who knows what will happen behind the scenes this summer? But again, I'll still support my club, even if the Tory debts are called in and we're relegated to the Belford Furnishings Ltd Midland Regional Alliance Division 2.

Meanwhile Matt Barker has responded to Middle-Aged Diary's plea for your highlights of this season, singling out Craig Disley's goal at Lincoln. "Just after they'd scored and we'd been under the cosh for the start of the second half," recalls Matt, "I was starting to fear the worst. The Lincoln fans sort of made some noise (for them it was good anyway) and they were well on top. Then a great bit of play by Town with several players throwing themselves at it to try to force it in culminated in a cracking finish by Disley. And with that Lincoln were done and the points were sealed. The thrashing we gave them that day almost healed the wounds of that terrible day when Slade Out gave them a half time telling off on the pitch."

Matt continues: "In the last five/six years, every single Town team I've known would have rolled over and we'd have lost 3-2 and have had to endure chants of '2-0 and you fucked it up'. This team is different. They've got a bit of heart and you wouldn't mind seeing them besides you in the trenches. There seems to be a connection between the team and the fans for the first time in ages. That's why, even if the season goes tits up, I'll look back on this season, and this team should it be dismantled, with fondness and hopefully be able to pinpoint it as the season when Town finally started climbing again after the dreadful decade we've had." Thanks Matt. Damn straight.

And lastly today Matt Pakes has emailed about the other semi-final, between Wrexham and Kidderminster, "and one thing has stuck out like a sore thumb. The process for rescinding the red card awarded to David Artell. I have no problem with the chap playing, I haven't seen the incident but whatever. Also in '05-06 didn't Gary Jones have a red card taken back just before the play-offs?" He did, Matt. We at Cod Almighty even funded the appeal.

"Anyway," continues Mr Pakes, "how is it possible that the Football Association of Wales have the jurisdiction to take away the card?! Am I missing something here... The Welsh FA is supposed to be an entirely separate entity with a different national team, league and qualification for European cups. I think it stinks that they can take away, and apparently control, the disciplinary procedures of the English league. Does this mean the FA could just give a load of Welsh Premier league players some bans for no reason? If not, why not? This baffling procedure has made me strangely angry. I'm going to need a lie down and take the rest of the afternoon off..."

Answers on an e-postcard please readers. Personally I expect it's something to do with that great conspiracy, you know, the great conspiracy against GTFC/in favour of Welsh clubs/to clear the path for an alien takeover of the world. I for one welcome our new celtic overlords, particularly if it means never having to hear another song about England or the bloody queen.