Cod Almighty | Article

by Theme team editor

27 November 2014

Compiling the Cod Almighty Theme Team is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you are going to get. For 'could have been a contender', we were expecting tales of injury and insane managerial prejudices. Instead we got... well, take a look.

Goalkeeper

Dave Beasant nominated by Adam Deller
Steve Croudson by Richard Bedwell, Dan Humphrey

No-one can argue with Adam's description of Dave Beasant's brief Town career. "Although only on loan, Beasant's performances seemed to give everyone confidence, and he is regularly listed as our greatest ever keeper. If we could have kept him for the full season, imagine what could have been." However, the team is 'could have been a contender', not 'could have made us contenders had we had a huge budget'.

Steve Croudson, by contrast, is exactly the kind of player we were expecting. Injury robbed him of the chance to succeed Danny Coyne and in his emergency appearances under Neil Woods ten years later, he gave us a glimpse of what might have been.

Right back

Danny Butterfield by Adam Deller, Dan Humphrey
Shaleum Logan by Adam Deller
Shaun Mawer by Tony Butcher, Neville Butt

Adam admits he was "struggling for full-backs" when he thought of Shaleum Logan, who Neil Woods tried to turn into a full-back when we had him on loan from Manchester City. We had to remind ourselves who he was, and nothing in his subsequent career suggests that we particularly missed out.

Better remembered, but none too fondly, is Danny Butterfield. Those who remember just how good he was at right back in 1997, when he briefly kept John McDermott out of the team, are outweighed a hundredfold by those who remember everything that followed. As Adam concedes, the only real regret is that we didn't get a transfer fee for him.

The title of 1977-78 young player of the year must have been one of the most strongly contested in the history of the award. It was won by Shaun Mawer, a "superb footballer" who was forced to retire aged just 22, and who died in 2010.

Left back

Paul Agnew by Mike Potts
Dean Gordon by Neville Butt
Tom Newey by Dan Humphrey

Mariners Trust board members beware: Dan is clearly a man with a mischievious sense of humour. Case dismissed.

The other two are both fair shouts. Paul Agnew, a specialist left back, remained on the fringes of the first team for a dozen years, most of the time playing second fiddle to a converted midfielder. Dean Gordon was at Blundell Park for just four months under Russell Slade, but he made a big impression. "A decent player at a much higher level before he was slowed down by injury. In the lower reaches of the Football League he still had pace, drive, a sweet left foot and the ability to tackle. He was head and shoulders above the rest of the team but was dropped because of a dispute over, as I remember it, his refusal to adhere to travel restrictions."

That Agnew was recruited by Alan Buckley at West Brom draws the sting from his treatment, and of course in his absence we could rely on Kevin Jobling and Gary Croft. Neville swings it by reminding us that Gordon "was replaced by R. Bull Esq. who is a player in my Town worst 50" (and coming from Neville, that is some statement).

Central defenders

Rob Atkinson by Dan Humphrey
Zhang Enhua by Adam Deller
Simon Ford by Neville Butt
Keith Hanvey by Tony Butcher
Ian Knight by Tony Butcher
Clayton McDonald by Richard Bedwell
Josepth Robinson by Neville Butt
Richard Smith by Tony Butcher
Andy Todd by Adam Deller
Greg Young by Dan Humphrey
Martin Young by Neville Butt

Four crocks. Joseph Robinson arrived at Blundell Park in 1948 in a part-exchange deal with Middlesbrough. When it was proved he already had a knee injury, Boro gave us Paddy Johnston instead, who would make 250 appearances for Town. Martin Young was "a super defender" whose career was ended by a knee injury when he was 23. Ian Knight had his leg fractured in seven places at Sheffield Wednesday, had his career resurrected by Alan Buckley, then broke his leg again. Richard Smith made just 80 appearances over six years at Blundell Park, not because he was no good, but because he was always injured.

Three loanees. Adam's suggestion of Andy Todd falls for the same reason Dave Beasant did – he was never going to stay. Rob Atkinson, I remember thinking when he was on loan, was another destined for better things than we could offer, bearing in mind our reduced circumstances by then. I was wrong on both counts. He did come back. He wasn't that good. "Who can deny it felt cool to have a Chinese international at the back?" asks Adam of Zhang Enhua. I don't know. Shall we ask Peter Handyside?

Two young hopefuls. Simon Ford went from old head on young shoulders to young head on old shoulders. Greg Young stayed on the fringes of the first team under Paul Groves and Russell Slade.

Two more. Clayton McDonald was a "6'6" brick outhouse who [for a brief period around the time of last season's FA Cup run – Ed.] could play long passes Stevie G could only dream of". Keith Hanvey refused terms at Grimsby and instead went to Huddersfield in 1978 for his double promotion fix.

We'll go with Richard Smith, kicked out at a time when the club could not afford sentiment, and Martin Young.

Central midfield

Michael Appleton by Adam Deller, Dan Humphrey
Ashley Sestanovich by Too Good to Go Down
Andi Thanoj by Dan Humphrey
Johnny Walker by Richard Whitehouse
Menno Willems by Richard Whitehouse

Again, we have a couple of loanees to the fore but Richard rather undermines the case for Willems by admitting he was "extremely mediocre" once we'd signed him. However, Michael Appleton, "unlike Neil Webb and Lee Sharpe [and indeed Scott McGarvey – Ed.], was an ex-Man U player that was actually good for us" and it didn't seem implausible he might stay.

To partner him...

Sestanovich, Too Good to Go Down contends, was a "decent player underneath the madness" (he was sent to jail for his part in an armed robbery). Hmm, I saw him once, ventured a similar view and everyone in earshot tactfully pretended they hadn't heard me. I think we are in a minority of two on that one.

Johnny Walker and Andi Thanoj are not dissimilar; exotic, young, talented but slightly brittle. Looking him up though, I see Walker was already 22 when he made his Town debut, having knocked around Rangers' youth team and Clydebank for a few years. I also see that the impression I had that he was from the Scottish highlands is wrong. Until someone tells us Andi Thanoj is actually a 25-year-old from East Grinstead, he's in.

Right wing

Dougald Campbell by Neville Butt
Gary Cohen by Adam Deller, Dan Humphrey
Gary Henshaw by Richard Whitehouse
Ken Jenkin by Neville Butt
Tommy Watson by Dan Humphrey

Neville suggests two names from the 1950s. Dougald Campbell played in eight matches in 1951-52. We did not lose any of the league matches he appeared in but he never played again once regular winger Stan Lloyd regained fitness. Ken Jenkin came up through Grimsby Boys with Wally Lord and when they played together in 1952-53 against Carlisle "their understanding in the first half was outstanding". An exciting partnership was cut short when Jenkin wrecked his knee against Rochdale and Lord's development stalled.

Gary Cohen is another who struggled with injury. He was "hit and miss but a bright spark in a dark period."

Our last two right wingers are victims of managerial preference. Gary Henshaw was one of the players who left Town during the Mike Lyons purges. On his good days, Gary Childs lit up Blundell Park (and in my head, he still does) but some managers would have preferred the more reliable, dogged tenacity of Tommy Watson. 

Left wing

Ivano Bonetti by Adam Deller, Adam Howard
John Oster by Dan Humphrey
Lee Sharpe by Adam Deller

John Oster does not really qualify for this team. His appearances for Town were of high class and if he never had the career he might have, he did finally show a bit of what he could do when Reading were a top-flight side.

Lee Sharpe introduces a new interpretation of the theme – that of the player who never actually played for Grimsby. "It's maybe more fun to tell the story that he took a serious look at moving here and never came back." If he had come? Think Terry Curran or Terry Cooke.

That leaves us to ponder whether Ivano Bonetti could, really, have been a contender? With two nominations, we'll bow to numbers, especially as Adam Deller is careful not to overstate the case. "By chickengate, the rot had started to set in, but the very name Ivano surely leads a Town fan to think: 'Just imagine.'"

Strikers

Lew Armitage by Neville Butt
Peter Bore by Adam Howard, Tony Butcher
Daryl Clare by Richard Whitehouse, Dan Humphrey
Robbie Fowler by Adam Deller
Jimmy Gilligan by Richard Whitehouse
Steve Kabba by Richard Bedwell
Gary Lineker by Adam Howard
Martin Pringle by Adam Burns, Dan Humphrey
Michael Reddy by Adam Deller, Dan Humphrey
Jonny Rowan by Richard Whitehouse

More now on players who never actually played for us. It was surely never more than a messageboard rumour that Robbie Fowler might sign for Town. Gary Lineker was offered to Town but the board wouldn't stump up the transfer fee. Had they, I reckon we'd have thought him a goal-hanging waste of space. Jimmy Gilligan ("crap for us, but God-like status at Cardiff", and therefore a contender for a future Theme Team but not this one) could tell us a bit about that.

By contrast with players who never joined us (or we wish had not), two marquee signings. We paid a record fee for Lew Armitage in 1948. Eight games and two goals later, his "career was instantly finished when he collided with Jack Crompton in the Man Utd goal as Crompton went down to collect a low ball". Michael Reddy "clearly needed a rest in 2005-06 but we ran him into the ground."

Next, two more loan players who were out of our league. Steve Kabba, Richard admits, was "too expensive to sign" but provided "wonderful memories of him linking up with John Oster".

Adam persuades us to go against previous policy by reminding us that it is a loss for all of us when talent is denied its destiny, and what it was like to see such talent in a Town shirt. "I honestly thought Martin Pringle would be a bit shit, but from his first touches of the ball on his debut away at Forest he just oozed class. He had a rangy effortless running style and in his two games he glided past opposition players with ease. Every time he got the ball it was exciting.

"Being built from a packet of Twiglets meant inevitably that when someone got close enough to tackle him they would break him. I remember hearing his leg break from the Pontoon after Dave Challinor's horror tackle. Seeing him holding the top half of his leg up while the broken half flapped about is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen at Blundell Park."

Surely one of our strikers has to be a young player on the verge of living the dream and banging them in for his hometown club? Johnny Rowan could possibly have been a contender, but only if his body had developed along more athletic lines. More credible is the case for Daryl Clare, who broke excitingly on to the scene in 1997-98 but never did enough to convince Buckley he was a first-choice striker. He was also not born in Grimsby, of course. But this team was made for Peter Bore. He emerged in the first team under Graham Rodger, a fully formed professional footballer of the highest order, then underwent some Benjamin Button-like regression over the next five years.

The Cod Almighty 'could have been a contender' XI

 

		Steve Croudson
	Martin Young		Richard Smith
Shaun Mawer				Dean Gordon
	Andi Thanoj		Michael Appleton
Tommy Watson				Ivano Bonetti
	Peter Bore		Martin Pringle

Leaderboard

With five successful nominations, Dan Humphrey has had the biggest influence on this team. He is second in the overall standings, behind Neville Butt who has moved one nomination ahead of Adam Deller.

 

Total successful nominations	Nominator (Nominations this team)
Six	Neville Butt (Three)
Five	Adam Deller (Two), Dan Humphrey (Five)
Three	Tony Butcher (Three)
Two	Adam Howard (Two)
One	Richard Bedwell, Adam Burns (one each); Jack Connor, Donk Dawson, Jem Halfpenny, Pete Hirst, Charles Lumley, Ashley Smith, Richard Whitehouse (all none)

 

New theme: a Christmas/new year XI

Let's try something slightly different for the next Theme Team: a team of players suggested by Christmas. Interpret this how you will – players who had a blinder one Boxing Day; players who turned out for a new year's day match visibly the worse for wear; players with shiny noses; players who gave gifts to the opposition. Seasonal puns on players' names are welcome (but let's take Malcolm 'Partridge in a pear tree' as read).

As there's little more dispiriting than a Christmas theme hanging around after the holiday is over, we'll go for a brisk turnaround on this one. Get your nominations in by 15 December and we'll have the team out in time for the holidays.

Make your nominations for the Christmas/new year XI using the feedback form.