Cod Almighty | Match Stats

Saturday 22 August 2015

Conference Premier

Grimsby Town 2 Robinson (68), Amond (80)

Torquay United 2 Quigley (19), Robinson og (33)

Attendance: 4290 (70 away fans)

New Kid in Town

Matt Robinson looks like a tubby topknot on Twitter and, in the flesh, a little boy lost who was clearly not up to the fitness and sharpness required for a full professional football match. You know, we just felt sorry for him in the first half. He grew into the role in the second half, being ultimately adequate, with a keener eye for a pass than Clay. He may be OK in the long run, but isn't up to match speed.

At least he didn't shrivel after the disastrous first half.

A message in a bottle from the Spumanti slurpers.

Town were a lot better when the substitutes came on, and the catalyst for collective competency was the arrival of Danny East. He stood where he should, tackled, passed and brought some oomph onto the pitch.

"We know what the threat is. We spoke about the threat. But it's difficult to stop it."

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"I am disappointed, but I can't be too hard on these lads, because we've come to a difficult place to get one point, let alone three.

"We were excellent in the first half and totally bossed the game."

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The selection and construction of the team were hopeless. The team was hopeless, the individuals were hopeless. Toto at right-back is daft and dangerous, Robinson was embarrassing, and Disley looked suddenly fed up and pining for a life as a lion tamer. Monkhouse is a waste of time if he can't head it, Mackreth just feeble, and Bogle looked like a Conference North player. No style, no wit, no method, no ideas; just men ambling around and kicking a ball in the air, waiting for the opposition to kick it back.

Then the natural order was restored, and all was much better.

Nothing special, in fact a bit of a bore. Big blokes chipping and chasing, long, long balls and long, long throws, ducking and diving, rolling our eyes at their rolling and bawling.

Mid-table irritants, shouldn't be anywhere near the play-offs at the end of the season if they carry on like that. Awful to watch, awfully effective if you let them.

With something to support, the support was something audible.

Mr A Holmes (W Yorks)

Oh I just don't know where to begin. Accidents will happen, so this fumbler did manage to get one decision right when he didn't point spotwards for the Heslop hypothesis. Was mightily indulgent of their timewasting and cynical spoiling from the off, so a score above 5.654 would be ineffably outré.

This town knows, but Shorty doesn't.

In a word: irate