Cod Almighty | Match Stats

Saturday 24 September 2016

Division 4

Mansfield Town 0

Grimsby Town 1 Bogle (17 pen)

Attendance: 4401 (1535 away fans)

The New Old Man in Town: Mr Daniel Collins

He doesn't look, or move, like a 36-year-old. He knew where the ball was going before the Staggermen miskicked it there and uses his mouth to speak words to colleagues. Exactly what is required and Town are unlikely to be buried under an avalanche of rugby balls with him and Pearson together. So far, so good.

Pearson and Collins were a right pair of cruising bruisers, but taste the difference: Ben Davies. Approaching McDermottian levels of standing in the right place and defending without tackling.

"It's great when you win 5-0, and that certainly makes it easier as a manager on the sideline. But as a player, you take so much more pleasure from winning a game like that. You have to make blocks and put your body on the line. Strikers might think differently though!"

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"I'm distraught at this moment in time, because if they dominated us and ran the game you hold your hands up to the better team. But we're letting teams of the hook at the minute."

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Much running around and some sensible defending. Attacking? Why do Town need to attack when they can win without shooting?

Town defended perfectly adequately. Jamie Mack barely had to make a save because the centre was solid and the flanks only occasionally frazzled. And when the ball did go beyond the Giant Gloves of Jamie, Davies was calmly ahead of the pack.

It was all about keeping us shape and letting the old heads do their groovy thing.

A frantic 15 minutes followed by an hour of flannel and fluff. They couldn't even score by accident. They have one plan: give to it Green. That's not enough.

Their keeper ran further than anyone, chasing the ball out to hurry up throw-ins and goal kicks. Then launched the ball onto Town's old heads. Repeat ad infinitum. Perhaps this is what mid-table misery looks like.

Mansfield never change their ways. Vigourball chuffers who hit the buffers, forever crossing to the big lad they forgot to buy. Certainly no better than anyone seen so far, and worse than a few. How about 13th, which is almost a relegation in this league.

Never mind the quality of the football, feel the width of our support.

Mr G Eltringham (Co Durham)

Was not overly generous in interpreting the slings and arrows of outrage. Like his linesmen, he seemed intimidated by the home stand silence, apart from the penalty of course. With a sympathetic bonus point for having to wear the deep raspberry shirts and tight shorts, a generous bouquet of 6.251 is extended his way.

How to mug a mugger: kick and blush, hear the home crowd hush.

In a word: sprinkle