Match stats: Mansfield Town v Grimsby

Cod Almighty | Match Stats

Saturday 9 September 2017

Division 4

Mansfield Town 4 Angol (pen 34, pen 80), Pearce 54, Osborne og (64)

Grimsby Town 1 Jones (pen 85)

Attendance: 4625 (1252 away fans)

Cod Almighty man of the match: James McKeown

Berrett and Osborne were adequate, Dembele was a flickering flame, but for two excellent blocks and two excellent saves, there is no blame culture here.

Cod Almighty un-man of the match: Nathan Clarke

He still goes around as if he is always stumbling off a cliff. Do we still want him? What am I saying? Do we still want him?

Zak! Mills, Paul Dixon, Martin Woolford, Scott Vernon, JJ Blooper you can thank your lucky stars that Nathan Clarke is Russ's Paul Raven, the ultra un-Man of the Match.

Nathan stop playing. Really, I mean it. Can't we just forget him?

Us

Have you ever heard the story of the old, empty barn?

There was nothing in it.

Shorn of Shaun Pearson, Town have a black and white hole filled with old, decaying polyfilla. Devoid of a striker Town put the puff in powder. Leaderless, rudderless and useless. Less is more of the same, the decaying corpse lying in the wreckage of a year of self-induced tumult and change.

Vernon was timid and passed the buck twice inside the penalty area. Hooper tried last week and was trying us today. Woolford looked old. The full-backs would struggle to get in a Conference squad. And all the while Russ's tent pole keeps collapsing.

Can't attack. Can't defend. What can they do?

Fenty can you hear me? Fenty can you hear me? Fenty can you hear me? How can Town be saved?

Them

Typical Mansfield team, typical Evans team, typical fourth division mufflers and muddlers. Nothing subtle, nothing special, nothing but big blokes falling over. Stronger, faster, less worse individually and better collectively. They at least had a plan.

And a really useless set of full-backs, for neither can defend. And a fat useless goalkeeper who flapped and flopped like a bad toupee at the end of the Cleethorpes pier. Angol and Hemmings at least moved around, together, without looking like scoring.

These strolling stags were unimpressively superior to melting ice pops. If they get near the play-offs this division should resign, en masse, from the Football League in embarrassment and shame.

Grimsby 'til I die... or cry?

They’re behind you 'til the opposition get two.

Official warning

Mr P Tierney (Lancs)

Foul throws. This still exists doesn't it?

Town lost more heavily because of this dupe, a man whose calling is to fall for their falling. He just couldn't stop peeping when yellows tumbled in ever more absurd and physically improbable ways. And pulled his punches when Staggers punched clearances. He didn't add too much time, so a bonus point for allowing us to get the hell outta this place before 3 o'clock: 4.251.

Readers' digest

Foul throw, dive, foul, penalty, Clarke missing, Clarke messing, foul throw, penalty, and football most foul.

In a word: doom

Line-ups

Mansfield Town: Logan, Bennett, Pearce, Mirfin, Hunt, MacDonald (Anderson 71), Byrom, Mellis (Potter 87), Butcher (Atkinson 82), Hemmings, Angol

Subs not used: Olejnik, Diamond, Rose, Spencer

Booked: Butcher

Town: McKeown, Mills (Davies 61), Clarke, K Osborne, Dixon, Dembele (Jaiyesimi 74), Rose, Berrett, Woolford, Hooper (Jones 58), Vernon

Subs not used: Killip, Matt, Collins, Summerfield

Booked: K Osborne