Cod Almighty | Match Report

by Paul Ketchley

29 January 2011

Eastbourne Borough 2 Grimsby Town 3

The publicity boards told us that Eastbourne is the sunniest place in the country. Maybe so, but on Saturday a biting easterly wind swirled across the ground and the sun peeked from behind grey clouds. It reminded you of what Kevin Keegan said about playing at Blundell Park on a Tuesday night in February.

Eastbourne Borough's ground is actually in Langney, on the flatlands out towards Pevensey Bay, where the Normans landed in 1066. This time the invaders came down from the other direction and found generosity in abundance.

The generosity of our hosts had to be seen to be believed. At Eastbourne you are invited to use the car park, which extends round the back of the stadium and is free! There was no segregation of supporters either ("we only do that with clubs like Crawley or Luton," they explained at the turnstile), and inside the ground there were just a few low-level steps to the back of the stand. They had a decent PA system, a hut that seemed able to produce an inexhaustible supply of chips, tea and whatever else you fancied, some friendly stewards and what looked like a decent pitch. The police were conspicuous by their absence. Welcome to the south coast.

Town warmed up in front of the stand at the far end, away from the smart social club. The shorts confirmed it was a day out for the sky blue strip. The PA announcer went through the teams and told us that Kenny... errr... Adam would be in goal for Town and that Steve... err... Cruisden would be on the bench. One person definitely on show was new signing Rob Duffy. So Town lined up in the usual formation with Arthur, Bore, Atkinson, Kempson, Wood, Makofo, Cummins, Sinclair, Eagle, Connell and Duffy. Croudson, Watt, Leary, Hudson and Corner were on the bench. Atkinson's thigh was heavily strapped up, which caused a bit of concern.

The Langney Social Club is at one end of the ground and the referee trudged out from there across the pitch followed by the teams to a rousing rendition of 'Sussex by the Sea' on the PA. It must have had an effect.

First half: Take 'em to the cleaners
Town kicked off and wellied the ball left towards Duffy and Eastbourne were hesitant. They put the ball out for a throw-in. Eagle took the throw to Connell, who passed to Duffy, standing near the penalty spot and facing the goal. Duffy trapped the ball with his right foot, swung his left and buried the ball into the right corner of the goal. Quite probably the fastest debut goal in Town's history. Cue celebration! "We want seven," was the cry from the Town end, 26 seconds was on the big clock at the end of the ground and no doubt the optimists were calculating that if we kept this rate of scoring up we might win 180-0.

For the next few minutes Town peppered the Eastbourne goal. Sinclair narrowly missed the top left corner of the goal and Bore hit a shot over the bar. Maybe if one of them had gone in, the Eastbourne house would have collapsed like a pack of cards.

At the Euro '96 semi-final, England went 1-0 up in similar fashion against Germany. Ruud Gullit, who was commenting, observed that sometimes scoring early isn't always an advantage. In the same way, Town seemed unsure about what they should do - defend the lead or keep going forward. While they debated this, Eastbourne got their act together. Up front they had Damian Spencer on loan from Aldershot (Spencer played for Cheltenham when they beat Town in the Millennium Stadium play-off final) and on the right, Dan Walker loaned in from Luton.

With Kempson calling for "tempo", Walker soon showed that he had the beating of Bradley Wood. He skipped past Wood's tackle and showed impressive acceleration to leave Wood standing. Having done it once, he did it again, and then again. Wood was reduced to barging him off the ball and looking pleadingly at Eagle for support.

Eastbourne shackled Duffy at the back and every time he went for the ball two Eastbourne defenders sandwiched him and left him on the deck. Their direct approach started to pay dividends up front and they won a free kick outside the Town area when Kempson conceded a foul when the ball had been given away by Makofo. Eastbourne smashed the free kick against the bar and the ball flew up, only to be cleared away.

The pressure told when Eastbourne won a corner. Rather messily, Taylor bundled the ball into the goal. Delighted Eastbourne fans saw hope and salvation beckoning them. For the rest of the half the Eastbourne midfielders punted the ball forward into the wind for their front men to run on to. Shots flew over the Town goal, and cleared the little stand behind. A chain of ballboys ferried the balls back from the car park and they were soon recycled back onto the pitch.

Half time came as a relief for the Town faithful, who had watched the last 40 minutes of the half in dismayed silence. After a fantasy five minutes at the start it had been all Eastbourne. This wasn't going to be a slaughter of the Eastbourneites after all.

Stu's half-time toilet talk
"What are the symptoms of frostbite?"
"You didn't park the car in line with the goal behind that stand, did you?"
"I see Makofo has gone for blue boots now."

Second half: Don't give up on us baby
If anything it got colder over half time. Arthur came out early to warm up with Croudson and the Town players reappeared first. Connell was feeling the cold and frantically rubbed his forearms to get the circulation going.

After about ten minutes Watt replaced Makofo and Bore moved up to the right of midfield. Then the inevitable happened. Wood got skinned yet again on the Town left. From the edge of the box Walker put the ball across Arthur and into the far corner of the goal. It might have been inevitable but it was scarcely believable. How can you be anticipating a goal fest after 30 seconds and be 2-1 down an hour later?

Sinclair was taken off and Hudson replaced him. Maybe unexpectedly, this improved things. Cummins and Hudson started to click in midfield, Eagle started to cut inside and Bore started to run the right touchline. Could they turn things round? Connell started to run lung-bustingly hard chasing through balls. Connell and Duffy started to combine well. Would it all be worth it?

With 15 minutes to go Town got a free kick on the right. The Eastbourne fans screamed that the kick was being taken too far forward and it was moved back five yards. The ball came back across goal from Atkinson's head for Connell to nod the ball into the net.

This time it was the Town fans who saw hope beckoning. Connell and Duffy combined again and Connell chipped the ball over the keeper and into the top left of the net. The Eastbourne fans and players were deflated. The 200 Town fans celebrated. Three-two after 90 minutes sounded just as good as 180-0 had after 30 seconds.

Duffy had now given his all and it was too much for him even to jog back onside, so Corner came on with a few minutes to go. Almost immediately he got the ball in a good position but wanted too much time and the chance was gone.

Bore and Watt started to play out time in the right corner. Town saw off a last-minute free kick and the final whistle went with Town in front of the Eastbourne goal again. Connell was clearly delighted.

"Oh, we do like to be beside the seaside" blared from the PA system. The back doors of the stand were thrown open and we clapped the Town players off and rolled into the car, which was no more than ten yards from the doorway.