Cod Almighty | Diary
Lincoln derby grr, grr
17 August 2018
Wicklow Diary writes: The local Lincolnshire rags are full of derby filler. Once you've skimmed past the given that football hooligans will rob you of your pension as they ransack your place, we get to the real non-news. Opposition X's manager and midfielder have said that venue Y is always a difficult place to come to. Competition time! Send us the interview of a manager or player telling us a venue is always an easy place to visit. "I love it there, they roll over and let you tickle their bellies. You only have to show up for the three points wrapped in a pretty pink bow." There's a Mike Newell Revolution T-shirt in it for you. That's the Cod Almighty version, not the one promoting the shortlived opera-rap fusion trio of the same name.
Both organs are referring to tomorrow's game as "The Lincolnshire Derby". Scunny fans could point out that it should be an 'a' rather than a 'the' but they've been busy being too good for us and the Imps for the past fourteen years. We've played Boston in the league more recently and it's tempting to say we're more likely to play them than Plucky Scunny again any time soon. Regardless, the next time we visit the Pilgrims for a league game, they'll be in a new ground. What voodoo is this? Boston and the local country council have defied the rules of economics, planning and physics to break ground on a football stadium in Lincolnshire. Pity, I'll miss York Street and that big terrace. Where's our new stadium? Anyone? It was last spotted, fireworks and all, in Devon with a Torquay badge on it last month.
So for now it's just us and the Imps derbying. The fixture always seems to mean more than just three points to the Imps fans. Going by their online forum, the three points don't even matter this time, they've already awarded themselves those. They're only showing up to see how many they win by with the ever reliable 100% Imps site predicting a win of at least 3-0.
Hold it right there. No one should be judged on their internet forum. The Imps are on the up at the moment and good luck to them. The only reason I'd like to see them fall out of their tree is the superiority complex some of their new fans seemed to have. I say new, not as a dig at so-called plastics. But as a fact. Only the fresh faced would be naive enough to roll out that 'forever in our shadow' banner from the game at Sincil Bank in March. Officially the worst banner inside the old county lines since some plum ruined a good bed sheet to proclaim 'Hurst Out' ten days before the best day in our recent history.
Only the fresh faced and immature would forget that football is cyclical. As evidence, the mighty Grimsby Town I grew up with looked down on Tuesday's cup opponents, Rochdale. They were that team stuck in the division below us. Forever. That perception was the recipe for a good stewing after they gave us the run around in the 2-0 defeat. Not only that, in a match preview, a Rochdale fan gave us this eye-opener: 'From an outsider's point of view, Grimsby just seem to have been left behind as a club'.
We've been left behind. By Rochdale. Crikey. I'd be more upset if they hadn't given us one of the non-Town moments of last season with their last-minute equaliser against Spurs on the TV. Still, it smarts. I think that feeling that we are below our perceived level is why there is a lot of anger about when we have a bad result. How can else you explain this conundrum: fans get cross when Town are expected to win every week and don't, as in non-League; fans get cross when Town are not expected to win every week and don't, as this season.
Anyway, the past is the past. What a thing it was to have so many locals and youth teamers involved on Tuesday. More good news? We've played two and won one in the league. That's on course for Retro Diary's win one, lose one, all the way to the play-offs formula.
Team news? We've signed a new striker. Welcome, Wesley Alexander Nevada Thomas. Make yourself at home and score all you like. It would appear that only Cardwell, Whitehouse and the suspended Rose are unavailable.
As for Lincoln, all the old stiff-neck jibes are being rolled out about their route one hoofball. With John 'Big John' Akinde the headline summer signing, you would be forgiven for expecting that to be the case. That's not what the scouts say though. Words like passing and movement have been used. Whatever the formula, it's worked nicely so far. Tuesday’s 4-0 League Cup win at Port Vale made it three wins from three so far. It's a division four derby in front of a full Blundell Park so pretty, flowing football from either side is a tall order. We'll see.
Lincoln may be in for a surprise too. Danny Cowley made the odd comment yesterday that Town had lost to FGR because they'd overplayed from the back. Err, Danny, are you sure you've done your homework? Let's hope not. Carl Boyeson is the local ref for a local derby. Carl proved himself in the Notts County game in April, finally dispelling the line you'd heard in the Rutland from the guy whose sister's cousin's brother once babysat little Carl and overheard him in his sandpit vowing to destroy Grimsby. Kick-off is at 1pm, so set your alarm clocks and plan your chores accordingly.