Match stats: Scunthorpe United v Grimsby

Cod Almighty | Match Stats

Saturday 7 March 2020

Division 4

Scunthorpe United 0

Grimsby Town 2 Vernam (52), Waterfall (61)

Attendance: 6855 (2000 away fans)

Cod Almighty man of the match: Billy Clarke

He has very fine craft, he had the last laugh. Let's call him our Irish Rover.

Us

Heading for happiness in the land of the shrinking giants.

Town set up to smother and counter, and eventually remembered that they had tiny scurriers up front, not Hanson. Both goals were preceded by passing movements, the only passing moments during the whole shebang. Town did enough, that's all.

Let's not get too excited, there was nothing to beat.

Them

Unplucky Scunny were satisfyingly terrible, in every respect.

These Ironists were nothing, individually and collectively. Jamie Mack never had a shot to save. None of their current employees were worth wasting time thinking about, they should be ashamed of themselves.

We know that smell: the reek of the meek and weak, slowly descending into desperate desolation as mercenaries meander towards their bank balance. We know what a Bananarama-bound club looks and feels like and, without a heart and brain transplant, that's where they are heading next year.

Grimsby 'til I die... or cry?

Seeking leisure in other people's displeasure.

Official warning

Mr A Backhouse

Everybody! Backhouse's back and showed us the meaning of being lonely. The wayward wafter managed to get a couple of decisions correct, eventually, which is nice.

The Backhouse Boy lost control by having no control from the off as he indulged serial homester clogging, but also ignored Waterfall's dredging of the drainage ditches. He was just too timid: 4.567

Readers' digest

Two bald men fighting over an invisible comb.

In a word: kettling

Line-ups

Scunthorpe United: Watson; Lawrence-Gabriel, McArdle (Sutton 77), Butler, Bedeau, Butroid (Green 64), Gilliead, McAtee, Perch, Miller, van Veen

Subs not used: Songo'o, Lawlor, Rowe, Pugh, Liddle

Booked: Bedeau, Gilliead, Perch

Sent Off: Sutton

Town: McKeown; Hendrie, Waterfall, Davis (Pollock 46), Glennon (Tilley 59), Grandin, Hewitt, Whitehouse, Wright, Clarke (Green 74), Vernam

Subs not used: Clifton, Benson, Russell, Davies

Booked: Waterfall, Glennon, Hewitt