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Mystic Mick's forecasts for 12 April
While scrutinising my astrological charts for the forthcoming match against Crystal Palace, I suddenly became very excited. Immediately, I rushed up to the back bedroom, unpacked the old telescope, and ripped open the curtains. Later, after the police had left, taking with them my telescope and solemn promise that I would buy a dressing gown, I went back to the charts. It was true! If you take a picture of the night sky as it is on 12 April and join up all the stars in a certain way with a crayon, it spells out "twon win" which is almost "town win". Woh!
The unstoppable approach of Taurus at this time of year could be the reason behind Grimsby being victorious in ten of their 15 home matches. The Mariners' total of 34 goals in the 'for' column have surely helped too. They have beaten Sunderland 6-0, Charlton 5-0 and Manchester United 3-1; and even the mighty Glossop North End were laughed off the pitch in 1909, having being slaughtered 2-0. Coincidentally (or is it...?), Crystal Palace themselves were the disgruntled daytrippers in 1986, when they were humiliated 3-0.
I decided to consult the greatest prognosticator of them all, Nostradamus, at this particular website:
'Very near the Tiber presses Death
Shortly before great inundation
The chief of the ship taken, thrown into the bilge
Castle, palace in conflagration.'
This extract - stanza 93 of Century II - clearly mentions Palace at the end there. My mate Terry pointed out that "in conflagration" could mean that Palace will be 'on fire', but I soon put him straight when I told him that
a) this is a translation from the old French;
b) he wasn't skilled in the clairvoyant arts like what I am; and
c) it was his turn to get one together, so shut up and get on with it.
In actual fact the final words of that stanza are about defeat and destruction - Nostradamus is telling us that Palace
will lose. The defeat is also represented by 'Death' in the first line - also note in this line that 'Tiber' shares the same last three letters as
'Humber'. The second line indicates that it will be raining, and the third line is about a sending off for one of the captains. Yes indeed - all the
evidence is there for an exciting match that will finish Grimsby 2 Palace 1.
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