2003-04 season index
So a new season is nearly upon us and you know what that means don't you? No, not that. Or that, you filthy-minded bugger! I was talking about the return of my tips. Yes, I am back. Sort of. It is more accurate to say that my tipping system is making a long-awaited return.
Over the summer I have missed the weekly excitement of preparing a betting column for you. I've had to write a whole other series of articles to keep me busy instead. But with the start of the football season just hours away I can return to my first love, gambling. Except that I'm not, not yet anyway. I was told by the powers that be at Cod Almighty that the 71p I made last season was mine to keep and that I should use it to go on holiday. So I am. I've put it together with £1999.29 of my own cash and decided to take myself off to Kenya for a few weeks. All right for some, eh?
But my absence does not mean that my superb money-making tips will dry up. While I am chasing lions round the Masai Mara I am allowing Miles (of guest diarist fame) to run my spreadsheet and produce my tips for me. Yep, I'm trusting him to give me a good headstart this season because I understand that Coco is back with a sharper, pointier pin than last year.
Miles filling in as guest tipster is not the only change this season. Oh no. This year I am being forced to face Coco for the full season, not just after I have slipped into the red. Should be interesting to see how much I beat him by this year. Another change for this season is the way I will be betting on my tips. It took me a while but you might remember that last season I settled on a betting plan that used perm bets and an accumulator. Well, quite frankly the accumulator was a load of shit almost every week; and even though it was only 50p it was still money to the bookie so I have ditched that this year. So it'll just be the perms this season, again going for three from five perms. But the stakes will be different this season. A bit of clever maths over the summer has proved that I am better off weighting the stakes according to how highly rated the matches in each perm are. So that is what you will see this season.
Anyway, I'm going to pack my bags and bugger off on holiday for a few weeks. Be nice to Miles while I am away won't you? I'm sure he will cope marvellously. I'll be back with you for the first weekend in September. Good luck and happy betting.
Hmmm - I wonder what sort of rifle I need to go monkey hunting...