Cod Almighty | Diary

But it's alright now, in fact it's a gas

2 October 2025

Hey up reader(s). Your Guest diarist returns with the usual small, nagging, growing sense of foreboding which always appears within me after a great performance. The Lord Mayor is parading outside and you know what happens next my inner voice tells me. Rubbish! Two seasons ago we cruised to the easiest of wins at Salford; last season we won there as well, although I don't remember much about that one. BOTB reminded us yesterday, in his inimitable style, that this year sees a better Salford with not only a full team, subs and everything but even more cash stolen from the game by the pirates that own them. Well we will see about that, this year we have the Tomahawk Kid and the ghost of Alex Harvey backing us. We have the real treasure - so sod you Billy Bones Neville.

Everyone seems to be either talking about, flying or waving flags at the minute. Even the club has got in on the act announcing a flag design competition for the kids. No sticky backed plastic required - just a sheet of A4. Back in the nineties when I was going through the ridiculous phase of my life where I pretended to be a high flying IT businessman I took a night off, ripped off my disguise and went to see Izzard at some downtown SFO theatre. He was Eddie then, a only a part-time action transvestite. Nowadays he is full-time Suzie and really quite boring. Anyway Eddie was very funny that night and one of the best bits was when he talked about flags. Watch the first minute of this and I guarantee your day will brighten.

I had the misfortune to see a bit of the news this week. On screen appeared to be a load of Cabinet Ministers waving flags at the Prime Minister who was stood on a big stage looking smug. Apparently they were doing this because a populist opposition party have risen up using flags to differentiate themselves from the other political people. I am clearly and firmly apolitical but I urge all politicians to watch that sketch and, as the kids say, give their head a wobble.

Back to the football. I want to get in first with this. Providing we don't get an epidemic of injury knack we don't need to sign a single player in January when the manic episode of transfer window hits. Why? Because we have various players, new and old, that are really good and who haven't played at all yet really. Treat them as new signings when they re-surface. In January try to act like a smug December shopper who bought everything in August, eh? As McConaughey said "You just gotta keep livin' man. L.I.V.I.N." See yer.