Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Wednesday 13 January 2010

13 January 2010

And they're off! Neil Woodses is trying to clear out the dead wood - and none of it looks much deader at the beginning of 2010 than Danny Boshell, Jamie Clarke, Matt Heywood and Barry Fucking Conlon. The awesome foursome have all, according to the Grimsby Telegraph, been effectively transfer listed this month, with their names circulated to other clubs and the players told they can go for free if they find a new home. Heywood's fate appeared to be sealed by his alarming inability to move during his last appearance - Town's 4-0 hammering at Port Vale in September - while Clarke's and Boshell's inconsistency above all else appears to have made up Woodses' mind. Conlon is a player who might have been genuinely useful to the Mariners had his head been right but has looked less and less interested as Town have sunk deeper into the mire - so fair play to the manager for deciding to get shot, and good luck with that, Neil, as the interested clubs form a huge and barely manageable queue.

Like many an old-school Tory grandee before him, John Fenty (Con) has been known to exhibit insufferably sexist tendencies. Witness today's Telegraph, where the Town chairman can be found issuing yet another rallying cry to the supporters ahead of the side's could-really quite-do-with-winning clash against Cheltenham this Saturday, announcing a "Dad and Lad" special offer and railing against "lady luck". Fenty expresses a hope that fans "will be out in force on Saturday for what is one of the biggest in our history", while the Diary expresses a hope that the missing word isn't "defeats", but it's becoming steadily clearer why the Five Star Misogynist initially thought Mike Newell was such a top bloke.

Cast your minds back to last Friday, readers, when the Diary wondered aloud whether the Telewag's reference to the "Seafood Company East Lincolnshire Combination" was altogether reliable. Dave the Engineer has emailed to say: "Just a note to confirm that the East Lincs Combination does indeed exist. The sponsor's name changes from time to time (it was once the Co Jos and has also been the Kenwick Leisure League), dependent on whoever decides to put up the prize money. This is the league where myself and Sibbo played up until our mid-forties for various teams including South Thoresby, Martin Engineers and Alford Town. See where the nickname comes from! PS. They could use a pacy right winger of the Stuart Brace mould, shame my knee's gone." And Dave the Engineer's teammate Sibbo adds:

I played in the East Lincs Combination for well over thirty years but I'd no idea it had the Seafood Company tag to it.During the past ten years or so, several teams from the Grimsby area have joined. This, I'm led to believe, is because the Grimsby league itself is not as strong as it once was. I`m not a hundred per cent sure on that though. The Grimsby connection could be the reason for its sponsorship in any case. My Dad played during the 1930s, my brother from the early 1960s up to the early 80s. At some time during our playing days, we all took the field for South Thoresby and came away with many happy memories. In the majority of those years it was known as the East Lincs.

There is a connection with our beloved Grimsby Town if I haven`t been told porkies. Earlier this season Jammal Shahin played for one of the teams (not sure which) in the Da Da East Lincs before returning to Town to no doubt disappear back down the food chain. I do hope I'm wrong cos he looks fairly useful and Woodsy did recommend he be given another chance.

Thanks for sharing your experience, chaps - it's great to hear about the local leagues and the Diary is a better place for the finer detail. Of course, I wasn't doubting the existence of the league, just whether "Seafood Company" should have been replaced with the actual name of a seafood company - although with such a dearth of imagination among Grimsby capitalists that there exist local takeaways with names like Pizza Pizza, maybe Seafood Company is the name of a seafood company.