Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 20 January 2005

20 January 2005

Life throws some harsh lessons at you. Last week today's diary writer was deciphering the finer legal points of gaining access to see his daughter. No sooner had I signed a tidy sum over to a solicitor to sort it out (he wasn't called Slade sadly), then this week I have to get my head round the crisis concerning one of the other loves of my life; namely Town. So it is that the gauntlet is thrown down to the people of Grimsby to prove that they still want their football club with the launch of the "Keep The Mariners Afloat" campaign (as it has been, ahem, 'branded'). The aim: raise £420,000 to pay off the outstanding tax bill, with the club and the directors stumping up the/an additional £300,000. In true Powerpoint presentation stylee, six bulletpoints are laid down: the promotion of the club's profile by local dignatories, the council and various media; higher attendances; increased use of the facilities at Blundell Park on non-match days; more shares purchased in Grimsby Town Football Club; increasing the membership of the Grimsby Town Supporters Trust; and a protected trustee loan account.

Your everyday not-exactly-rich supporter is asked to convince/bribe/drug Mr T style all manner of friends, family and enemies to Blundell Park on matchdays. If you want a slice of the club there is the option of purchasing a minimum of £50 of shares, rather than the £100 minimum as was the case previously. Legends Matt Tees and Lawrie Mac (who can't be short of the odd bob himself) contribute soundbites. All of it sounds like good stuff, but one can't stop hankering that shouldn't these sort of initiatives been spelled out years ago before the majority of the NE Lincs area stopped giving a toss about the club? Anyway, until Mark Stilton finally perfects his time machine, let that be water under the bridge. Now if we could be told how long we have to raise this cash, that might add a little more urgency to the matter...

Cod Almighty's resident think tank has rumbled into action for cash-raising ideas with Messers Metcalf and Hare brainstorming the idea of one of Sam's legendary gigs at BP. Their wishlist consists The Rumble Band, The Hamsters, Pisces, Anal Beard, "that Marti Pellow (?) lookalike from Grimmo who used to be on Stars In That Eyes", Verity of X-Factor, "that bloke who's in Charlie Busted's new band is from Grimsby. Fightstar. I'm sure they'd be up for it", and Rodge Sings Rod as MC. Don't hold your breath.

And don't hold your breath about Ashley Sestanovich appearing at Blundell Park again in the near future. Poor Russell is angered over Stan's tizzy fit at the ref last Tuesday, in addition to his refusal to be a benchwarmer against Swansea. "I've spoken to Stan and I have told him that he can leave." Stan spent yesterday talking to Neil Warnock, who sent the Incredible Sulk for a season in Meggies so he could see if the lad could have a future at his own club. One departure that is confirmed is Darren Mansaram who has sealed a permanent move to Halifax Town for a nominal fee. The Mansarama's move was inevitable once Russ brought in fellow-frontman Martin Gritton.

And here ends the third day of your Leeds-penned diaries for this week. Tomorrow we'll be hoping to give a debut to a promising player plucked from the lower leagues. Remember the days when Town used to do that? The days of Action 88, full houses at BP...