Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 10 November 2005

10 November 2005

What a difference three weeks make. In mid-October the Mariners were top of their division, with three times as many fans as seats, still in three cup competitions and with optimism oozing from the very reinforced high-carbon steel sheeting of the John Smiths stand. Today the side finds itself knocked out of three cup competitions and deposed from the summit of the table on the back of the worst run of home results in GTFC history, with the player of the season so far expected to be out of action for up to a month. The mighty Rob Jones was subbed off in the first half of last weekend's FA Cup defeat by Bristol Rovers and will undergo a hernia operation today which is likely to sideline him for three to four weeks, reports Town's official website. The OS adds that Andy Parkinson, who clearly shouldn't be anywhere near a football pitch until he's recovered, is still suffering from shin splints, with Michael Reddy and Martin Gritton also having missed training with, um, other stuff. At least it's not raining, though, eh?

So cheer up, everyone. Last night's reserve game at Scunthorpe has thrown up a convenient potential replacement for either Mr Redds or Mr Gritts - albeit one whose past record suggests he is unlikely to become that much sought-after 20-goals-a-season man any time soon. The performances of trial striker Bas Savage and his fellow testy-outy dude Kris Gate have had our Russ purring with delight, to the extent that the OS is today implying that Savage may be given some sort of contract in time for him to feature as a substitute in tomorrow night's game against Macclesfield. Cor. What? Oh yeah. The reserve game finished nil-nil.

Unfortunately for fans of traditional left wingers, Dennis Skinner and Tony Benn played no part in proceedings at Scunthorpe yesterday; nor did Sheffield Wednesday's Richard Evans - which is a big shame if John Pakey's email to the Diary is to be believed. "Good player," enthuses JP. "Was really impressed by him during his pre-season spell for Colchester United. He looked very handy indeed. As far as I could tell he got mucked about a bit by Sheffield Wednesday during the summer. Being told he could try elsewhere only to be hauled back because of some injury or something to another player in the squad at Hillsborough. He is a handy out-and-out winger and I think, from what I saw back in those crazy days in July and August, he would easily be capable of getting a place in a Division Four line-up. I liked him a lot, and he had a sensible haircut to boot." John's view of Evans differs markedly from that of the Diary's mate's work colleague who holds a season ticket as Hillsborough and describes the player as "terrible, but he's got a good sun tan". Oooh, and we were just talking about Scott McGarvey.

If, like Superstitious Granny Diary, you harbour a fondness for thrashing visitors to your house with a barbed wire walking stick if they put their shoes on your table or leave their umbrella up in your scullery, then you doubtless have noted that Town's current record-breakingly awful run of home results has coincided exactly with the presence at Blundell Park of sections of temporary seating. The temp seats were, of course, green: a hue that we simple-minded seafaring folk consider particularly ominous as it is traditionally the colour worn by nasty sharks, or something. Anyway, they have now been removed, so if it's their fault that Town have lost their last five home matches and nothing to do with Russ's conservative, one-dimensional long-ball counterattacking tactics then the manager will be unable to claim any credit whatsoever should his team claim three points against Macc tomorrow night.

Lastly today, an email from veteran Diary emailer Mark Wilson. "Hitherto I had merely amused myself with the fact that Pete Green of Cod Almighty shared the same name as the legendary Fleetwood Mac and British blues scene guitarist," writes Mark, admitting: "I am, it has to be said, easily amused. But I discover today that CA's Pete Green is indeed a pop artiste who has his gigs advertised on t'internet. Is he the same one? If he is can I send my collection of early Fleetwood Mac and Splinter Group CDs to the Diary to be signed? Is he a man of the world? Does he have thin legs? Oh well." Well, Mark, they could well be one and the same. The last time the Diary met him, Pete Green was muttering about his Cod Almighty commitments and then said something about an albatross around his neck.

That's all from me for another week, then, but stay chooned tomorrow when this page will, I believe, be brought to you by the original (and some say the best) Guest Diary. TTFN.