Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Wednesday 2 November 2005

2 November 2005

It's the moment the North East Lincolnshire pie industry has been dreading for nearly three years: Tony Crane is set to leave Blundell Park. The sizeable centre-half, who joined Town in 2003 from Sheffield Wednesday (where he managed to convince at least one supporter that he was future England material) has been out of the first-team picture for well over a year since doing himself a mischief in last year's pre-season and more recently being excluded from Russell Slade's innovative new 'back four' system by the ace form of Rob Jones and Justin Whittle. Even during his first season with the Mariners, when he was nominally a first-choice defender, Crane was absent as often as not with the multiple suspensions he totted up for a succession of red cards, and rumours of his imminent departure have circulated since the player had a complete smeller in the recent indifference-fest against Morecambe. "There has been a little bit of interest in Tony," says the player's manager Mr Russell Slade, adding: "York were one of the clubs. I am not sure if they are still interested [after Crane appeared in the reserves' 4-0 defeat by York last night]." If they're not, there's always Armthorpe Welfare, North Ferriby United and Richmond SC.

Did I mention the reserves' 4-0 defeat by York last night? The result - described by Town's assistant manager Graham Rodger as "a disgrace" - could have been an even bigger disgrace had it not been for a penalty save by John 'Junior' Lukic to deny the Minstermen's Ryan Mallon a hat-trick. 'Disgrace' is, of course, an overused word in football, so to place Grezza's comments in perspective let us bear in mind that the Mariners' second string have, so far as the Diary can ascertain, lost every single game they have played so far this season and lie bottom of the Pontins Holidays League East with zero points from five matches. Or it might be six; I'm not sure. Either way, it's not very good. Disgraceful, even.

When they're not running Lassiter's or enjoying simultaneous intercourse with an attractive pair of twin sisters, there's nothing men called Paul Robinson seem to enjoy more than a spot of association football. One of them, of course, did so with Grimsby Town for a little while in 2002, as a striker who scored one goal in 18 appearances for the Mariners before famously managing three goals against them in a single appearance for Hartlepool. This man has now joined Town's fourth division counterparts Torquay on a short-term contract after having turned out for a variety of other clubs - including York, so there's every prospect of Big Tony following him back into League football one day.