Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Tuesday 10 January 2006

10 January 2006

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As presciently suggested in yesterday's Diary (what?), Tony Crane has completed a permanent transfer to Worksop Town, severing his links with the Mariners after two and a half disappointing years at Blundell Park. Well, it's permanent until the end of the season, anyway. As the transfer window opened with the new year the amply posteriored defender-turned-striker joined the Conference North side on loan while he tried to squeeze as much cash as he could out of GTFC - sorry, I mean reach a settlement over the months remaining on his contract with GTFC - and has already scored once in two appearances for his new club. Crane squandered his penultimate chance on North East Lincs with a red card in his third appearance this season - his third dismissal in just 42 league starts for Town - and his fate was sealed a couple of months ago with a shocker against Morecambe in the vans thing. In summary, then, Crane had more cards than Athena and Clinton put together, and if his performances were frequently half-arsed, his arse certainly wasn't.

And as you may have seen in recent days, Town's righteous right-back John 'The Anticrane' McDermott is hoping to return to the team for the visit of Mansfield this Saturday, after a few weeks out with a hurty ankle. As you may then have thought if your mind works anything like the Diary's, "ooh, that means Matty Bloomer can move into the middle alongside Rob Jones, and then our defensive injury crisis isn't quite as bad after all, despite the absences of Justin Whittle, Simon Ramsden and Gary Croft!" That's pretty much the state of play today as the Mariners' official website confirms that Simon and the Shearer Scarer won't be back around for a week or two. As for Croft and Jones, there is no news. No news is good news, as the old saying goes, except on the Mariners' official website, where no news is just no news.

There is news on the OS, however, about Town's bottom-of-the-league reserve team, whose latest defeat will be inflicted tonight by Sheffield United B: not the Blades' second XI, who play a division higher than the Mariners', but their third team. "A very young Mariners side travel for the clash," says the official site, ominously. Aren't there laws to protect children against severe beatings? I'm sure the Daily Express said we were living in a nanny state.

As another old saying goes, old Mariners never die - they just sign for Northwich Victoria. Except for Ronnie Bull, that is, who has followed Simon Yeo back home from the Antipodes and turned off at Irthlingborough to sign for Rushden & Diamonds (remember them?). New Zealand must be really horrible. Another ex-GTFC left-back, and this time a half-decent one, has landed a division higher as Blackpool have awarded Dean Gordon a month-to-month contract following his recent exertions in Cyprus and with, er, Crook Town. And if you've got a soft spot for struggling Lancashire clubs and a religious temperament then spend this afternoon praying for Bury. The Shakeys have loaned Anthony Williams from Carlisle, who have zoomed up the league table since removing the bollock-dropping former Town keeper from their first team as early as September. What might have been last season, eh.