Cod Almighty | Diary
Diary - Wednesday 22 August 2007
22 August 2007
There are seven pillars of wisdom in this Diary. Welcome to the dynamic underbelly of Grimsby's chattering class. The trick is not minding that it hurts.
With Mr Normal Diary resting his head upon the seabed it's time for some cryptic Cluedo in his stead. It's Deviant Diary with all the abstraction and distraction you could possible want. Switch off that pro-celebrity mowing on Channel Four E=mc2 + 1 for Einstein's a-go-go. I'm not Gordon Honeycombe, here is news.
Town's cup has been runneth over. The mix 'n' match Mariners somehow lost to little Lincoln, a club an estate agent confirmed is built to NHBC standards with outstanding views to the rear of someone else getting promoted. After 104.63 per cent of possession, the players with fringes were accursed by the usual Town affliction: losing dominance. For those amongst you who like things as straight as Norman Stanley Fletcher's arrow Grimsby Town were defeated in the Lincolnshire Senior Cup semi-final played in Lincoln, by Lincoln City, by two goals to nil. Both goals were scored by a young scallywhimple called Ollie Ryan. It was a bit wet and the Buckmeister General declared he had learnt (or possibly learned) nothing new.
The pro-celebrity mowing has finished, it's cockle counting in Cumbria with Melvin Bragg now.
Who said Lincolnshire don't rrrrrock? Archivists and anacondas may remember that Guest Dairy's tent burned down at the Bardney Festival, but even Cod Almighty's own Wavy Gravy missed out on this: Barbeque '67. Hendrix and Pink Floyd live in Spalding, man those were the days. Do not be downhearted for, forty years on, let's all get out and groove about, they're doing it again. Look, it's even the real Geno Washington. Guest Diary is tickled by the past, but he's disappointed that there are no more Japanese soldiers emerging from tropical rain forests. Now that something that definitely didn't happen in Lincolnshire, even on 1967, or under Nicky Law.
The club missed a marketing opportunity there, didn't they. Who, in those turbulent times of anarchy in our defence, wouldn't have purchased ballistic trousers, with the club badge on of course.
You know there's a game this Saturday, don't you? No-one is looking forward to it more than local resident and former sushi chomper Martin Gritton, the marinaded Mariner. He'll only play if his Husband's unfit.
"The kids gave us 'Crazy Frog', now its payback time". Indeed, time for some mature revenge I feel. Come on people! Do it for 79p and England!
The condensed milk version especially for Eve
Town lost 2-0 last night, there's a recreation of a 1967 gig in Spalding using tribute bands, trousers with funny names and a jovial prank attempting to subvert the pop music charts with a very short worm of a song about undergarments.
This Diary was brought to you by ambiguous hero Mr T E Lawrence, and an Octopus's Garden in the shade