Cod Almighty | Diary
Diary - Tuesday 6 November 2007
6 November 2007
For most ordinary people, life is little more than the long hours of meaningless drudgery that the capitalist system requires of us in exchange for the basic necessities to sustain it. In other words, life is hell. But even its darkest moments may be shot through with rays of light. And so it is that, even as the Mariners follow up each successive low ebb with another, lower ebb, proving that even at the bottom there's always room to fall further down, Ryan Bennett has been put on stand-by for the England under-18 squad in their friendly against Ghana later this month! "It's a big honour for me to even be considered," the 17-year-old centre-half tells Town's official site. "When you look at the squad, there's one from the [second division] and a keeper from Huddersfield; the rest are from Arsenal, Manchester United and Chelsea." He's not actually in the squad, you understand, but when the game approaches and those duplicitous Premiership bastards order their players to pretend they're injured, young Ryan will be top of the list to step in and replace them.
Even this shaft of radiance could plunge the Mariners back into deeper darkness, however, because if Bennett is promoted to the full u18 squad then Buckley's battlers could be left up the creek without a right-back. Granted, GTFC may not have a fixture on 20 November - the day the England game takes place at Gillingham - but preparations for the weekend's visit to Barnet may have to go on without a defender in that position, as Shaleum Logan could play his last game for Town this evening at Bastard Franchise Scum. A preview of the match in today's Grimsby Telegraph says "it is understood" that the free-scoring loanee will be returning to his parent club Manchester City. "He goes back after tonight and I haven't discussed anything with Man City, to be honest," says Alan Buckley as the newspaper abdicates its journalistic responsibility to at least request from the manager an explanation of this seemingly perverse decision.
Do you want to know anything else about tonight? Martin Butler and Isaiah Rankin should both be back in contention while Bennett replaces Nick Fenton at the centre of defence (a switch that should not have had to wait, in the Diary's opinion, until the latter got himself suspended). I trust you're not planning to treat BFSFC as a legitimate football club - or indeed as anything more than the scum they are - by actually attending the match. No? Good.
Some of you were kind enough to email the Diary while I was away last week, giving me something to come back to other than relentless misery. There's a massive missive from Ben Gresswell, which will have to wait until we've got more space (ie. less news), but James Booth shortly and sweetly calls our attention to an article on the BBC website discussing potential stadiums for a World Cup in England in 2018. "What about the 'Harry Haddock Dome' at Grimsby?" asks the author Steve Boulton, whose brief was presumably to sap his readers' will to live. "Although this is (presumably) a joke," muses James, "if Positive John reads it he might get ideas for funding the Fentydome." Well, let's face it: if ever there was a man in need of a plan B, it's PJ.
"Just got back from Portugal on holiday," wrote David Elvidge. "While there I got chatting to two blokes from Walsall, who mentioned the standing ovation accorded to our manager at a get-together of former players." Yes - it's just a shame he has never received anything like the respect he deserves from 'supporters' of his current club. Buckley, I mean, not David; I'm sure David's popular enough. Elvidge, give us a wave! Elvidge, Elvidge, give us a wave! Boooo.