Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 3 January 2008

3 January 2008

When Positive John Fenty reacts publicly to the grumblings of Town supporters the Diary's response is normally to put a fist in my own mouth, to slap my own forehead or, at the very least, to sigh quite heavily. Though barely a week passes without crazed local conspiracy theorists accusing the GTFC supremo of all manner of chicanery, skulduggery, and carpetbagging, or just being a bit stingy, the GTFC supremo does not tend to help his case by reeling off tetchy, heavy-handed and ultimately counterproductive responses to whichever crackpot allegation he's stumbled across on a messageboard most recently. Today, however, the chairman can be found in the pages of the Grimsby Telegraph with an entirely calm, diplomatic and well-balanced refutation to "accusations that players have only been drafted in on the cheap so far this season" (the newspaper's words, not his). Citing the club's attempts to loan Michael 'Humber' Bridges and bring in Princess Martin Paterson permanently, Mr Fenty says he was prepared to pay the wages of the former in full and shell out a transfer fee for the latter, in measured tones and convincing terms which set out his case excellently well. True, seven or eight out of ten readers are perfectly aware of Town's parlous finances, and would probably understand entirely if PJF had tried only to recruit players on the cheap, but let's give credit where it's due - up to an agreed overdraft limit, of course.

Did you ever wonder what happened to Mark Lever? Last the Diary heard, he was working as a postman while lining up part-time for Ilkeston Town, after his professional career petered out with Bristol City and Mansfield following his departure from Blundell Park in 2000. Well, now he's joint caretaker manager of Bridlington Town. The Northern Premier League side have sacked their management team after taking only 17 points from the first 22 games of the season, and the former Town defender has stepped into the breach for the time being in a questionable-sounding co-managerial capacity alongside Brid chairman Peter Smurthwaite. If Lever can bring to management what he brought to textbook lower-division centre-half play then his side are sure to climb the league before very long - though it may be too late this season to challenge the First Division North's leading sides such as Curzon Ashton and FC United - whose former Town trialist Rory Patterson, incidentally, has scored a far from trifling 24 goals already this season.

Before I leave you in the capable hands of Guest Diary for tomorrow's fond farewell to a short working week, let's take a quick dip into the Diary's inbox for the first time in 2008. Rob McIlveen (or "Phil Ball's mate", as he name-droppingly styles himself") is the only Cod Almighty reader to have admitted recognising a recent Tony Butcher reference: "Well, well, well. The last time I heard the three words ['Banana, nirvana, mañana'] that made up the title of Tony B's report of the Lincoln match was back in 1973. I think those of us of a certain vintage have a pretty good idea of what Tony's record collection looks like, but Radio Gnome Invisible (you have to say it as the French would say it)? Was it in the deleted section of Rayner's, Tony, or did you actually pay full price for it?" The Diary was more of a Humber Records man, of course...

Ian Jackson, meanwhile, "was looking at a BBC web article about the classic Oldham/Everton FA Cup game in 1990" when he discovered a rather alarming name from GTFC history. "Is that the same ex-Town Scott McGarvey?" he trembles. "I think it is. Second Oldham substitute behind Paul Warhurst. If only we had known how the future would turn out." Indeed - the Mariners' feat in shipping McGarvey off to Bristol City in 1988 must rank alongside one of the club's finest ever transfer coups. The Diary believes, in fact, that the achievements of managers in getting shot of duff players without having to pay up their contracts a la Menno Willems ought to be recognised alongside the hallowed great signings of yore. Lord Alan Buckley may have tarnished his record by bringing in Murray Jones and Rhys Wilmot, but let us not forget that he recouped their transfer fees by convincing some poor suckers at Brentford and Crystal Palace that they were the answers to their prayers.