Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 29 September 2008

29 September 2008

Not content with transforming GTFC into one of those laughing stock clubs that average a new manager every season or so (see also: Real Madrid, Newcastle United, Tottenham Hotspur), Town chairman Deadly John (Con) has gone one better and effectively sacked his second manager in two weeks. Caretaker boss Disco Stu Watkiss will not be given the job permanently, it was subtly but firmly declared after Saturday's home defeat by Barnet ("the board confirms, [their comma] that this managerial post will be an external appointment [sic.]"). In truth, Fenty has made a shrewd call by making the announcement "in order to unite the club, players and fans" immediately after Town's worst performance since the Nicky Law catastrophe in 2004, but he will have bitterly disappointed hundreds of supporters who had spent the previous week telling anyone who would listen that Watkiss had already been promised the job - he was the cheap option, apparently - and were revving themselves up for another frenzied campaign of turning up to one match in six months and singing "woddaloooadarubbish" all on one note.

Bad news, too, for those Town fans who had convinced themselves that Alan Buckley's baldness was the only impediment to our club being propelled single-handedly back up the divisions by Straight Peter Bore. The Mariners' talented but sexually unadventurous right winger, it was thought by some, had been held back by Buckley's old-fashioned man-management style and lack of hair, but SPB has been sent home early from his loan at non-League York City after failing to impress Minstermen boss Colin Walker for much the same reasons he failed to impress Buckley. "[Straight] Peter Bore started brightly," Walker has told the local paper, "but I've watched him maybe six times and, in two, he was absolutely outstanding and, in four, he was in and out. It's the same story in training as well... Hopefully, [Straight] Peter Bore will take this disappointment as a kick up the rear end and go back to the new Grimsby manager, kick on and show him that he's got pace, can turn and score a goal." The Diary shares Walker's hopes entirely, although it should be noted that SPB some time ago made public his unwillingness to take anything up the rear end.

Lastly, our apologies to anyone awaiting Cod Almighty's match report on Saturday's game (mostly Barnet fans, we'd imagine - and if any are reading the Diary, please accept our hearty congratulations on finding a worse team than yours!). It will be published later this afternoon, having arrived severely late at Cod Almighty towers after our match reporter Mr Tony Butcher watched his computer melt, possibly in a kind of ironic tribute to the performance of Tom Newey.