Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Tuesday 6 January 2009

6 January 2009

While its 'soccer writers' wait eagerly for the Town manager's January transfer activity to begin, the Grimsby Telegraph is making the most of his famously opinionated personality. Today the local paper carries an article in which Mr Re-Newell rather uncontroversially agrees with every other football manager in Britain that there should be less "festive football" played. On the one hand the Diary can empathise with his viewpoint, as I am still at a loss to understand why we just had a match on a Sunday afternoon and not one on New Year's Day. On the other hand, though, my dictionary defines 'festive' as "joyous, merry; offering fun and gaiety", and by that reckoning there clearly needs to be a great deal more festive football at Blundell Park, not less.

Newell has further strengthened his stated policy not to look at foreign players by handing a trial to Kevin Tunani, a 21-year-old midfielder previously on the books at Bordeaux although not French in any way. Should the player win himself a contract at Blundell Park he will join the non-foreign legion already swelling the Mariners' ranks in the shape of Mickaël Buscher, who may not have an English-sounding name but actually grew up in Mablethorpe, Jean-Louis Akpa Akpro (Barton-on-Humber) and Jean-Paul Kamudimba Kalala (Goole). Despite his non-Gallic origins - Tunani has also recently had trials with Charlton, Cheltenham and Yeovil - the Diary is excited to have discovered one observer on the worldwide web compare Town's new prospect to the great Patrick Vieira. Then again, when Tony Crane was on the books at Sheffield Wednesday, one observer on the worldwide web said he was a future England prospect, so let's not get too carried away just yet.

West Bromwich solicitor Chris Beeley has emailed the Diary on precisely the topic of Town's new trialist and his vaguely piscine moniker. "Having read on the SNOS that we are 'looking at' Kevin Tunani," says Chris, "I can't help but feel that the mysterious humorous powers that brought us Bradley Wood are at work again. Next week perhaps we may have young German striker Klaus Kipperwitz on trial, or maybe promising Italian Ivano Skateri." Indeed, the Diary has already heard whisperings surrounding the arrival of Sri Lankan left-back Srinath Halibutarulanantham sometime next Monday morning. "PS: It's really not that bad being a solicitor in West Brom, honest," adds Chris. "I could be a football manager in Cleethorpes, so I count my blessings." Well, I think Cleethorpes is pretty nice these days. I don't envy anyone who has to be a football manager there though.