Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Friday 11 December 2009

11 December 2009

As diligent readers of this page will be aware, Guest Diary has recently moved from a weekly Friday slot to Mondays. Before this switch took place, GD would regularly complain that there was never anything very much to write about on Fridays. The Diary is starting to see what he meant. With very little even in the way of information about the teams for tomorrow's trip to Shrewsbury, the local media are forced to report not on things that are happening - because there aren't any - but, as is the case with so much dull modern football journalism, on stuff people are saying. And when was the last time you heard any football people say anything that wasn't so tedious as to make you chew your own legs off in despair?

Straight Peter Bore, then, says he's quite happy playing right-back, despite his insistence some time ago that his natural position is as a striker and therefore that the right of midfield was not a sufficiently attacking role for him. Schooled in the fine art of talking to the media and saying absolutely nothing, of course, SPB is hardly going to tell the Telegraph he absolutely hates playing in defence (despite being about as much of a natural defender as, say, Gareth Bale) and was far happier when Mike Newell was in charge and his habitual position was on the substitutes' bench.

Never mind - there's always the latest Cod Almighty pre-match factfile to keep you going.

Some other people, meanwhile, have said some other stuff. One of them is Newell's successor Neil 'Woods' Woodses, who says his relegation-haunted team is gradually becoming less shit, and that respectable performances for the reserves the other day have given a chance of involvement tomorrow to Danny North, Adrian Forbes and Barry Fucking Conlon. "They have to be professional, stake their claim to be back involved in the first team and educate the younger boys about how you should be a professional footballer - and they are doing that," says Woodses of experienced fringe players like Danny Boshell and Conlon, who of course educated the younger boys about how you should be a professional footballer last week by spending the morning of a match in a police cell in Scunthorpe.

Finally, Adam Proudlock (one of the very few players in the current GTFC squad to whom the Diary does not wish severe and lasting physical and psychological harm) says he hopes the team does well tomorrow. So do we, Adam. Knock 'em bloody dead, lad.