Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Tuesday 23 February 2010

23 February 2010

Mardy Diary writes: So Town take on Macclesfield tonight in what is already being dubbed as Super Soccer Special Tuesday Must Win League Two Six-pointer Special, by someone or other. You know the drill, I expect - Town really need to beat Macclesfield, then if Cheltenham beat Torquay, or Torquay draw with Cheltenham, or Notts County explode in a spasm of improbability taking three other teams with them, then we're safe. Until Saturday. At which point we need to see if the moon is aligned with Pluto and do some kind of weird dance. Or pay the ref. Whatever happens - that is what will be. Some are saying we must beat Macclesfield, I just think we must beat someone, and someone else, and perhaps a couple of other people. Easy.

Yesterday's Idle diary asked what your preferred outcome of the match between Cheltenham and Torquay would be - and some of you have actually bothered to write in. Bless ya. Tony Butcher would prefer that "both teams fail to turn up and are deducted 3 points" or "in a mass brawl three players from each side are sent off for punching the referee and/or linesman (Season to taste) An FA enquiry deducts five points from each team." It's a nice idea, and one also thought of by Michael Shelton who suggests: "0-0 and a mass brawl necessitating the referee to issue each team with 7 red cards and subsequently 7 players to suffer long suspensions. Ideally, could the brawl be sparked by some horrible tackles causing 3 month (but not career-threatening) injuries to several other first-team players. Oh, and in the aftermath of the brawl is there any chance we could have horrendous crowd trouble, punishable by point deductions for both teams concerned?" My preferred option is that Torquay should be relocated to Gloucestershire and both clubs merged and renamed after their new sponsor, Cheltenham & Gloucester Building Society, thus freeing up an extra space in the league for Town to take. But will those EU bureaucrats at Football League headquarters pay any attention to such lucid plans? Will they? No, they don't listen to real fans - too busy straightening bananas, I don't think! Write to your MP immediately - this is a government outrage and just another example of Brown's Broken Britain blah blah blah blah.

Actually, I think we need to win, don't we?

In other news, Jamie Clarke is now not playing at York, as opposed to not playing at Grimsby. Exciting stuff. The Telegraph then points out to us, ha ha, that Jamie Clarke could be playing in, get this, a higher league than Town next season - ha! I don't think so, really.

See you on the other side.