Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Tuesday 16 March 2010

16 March 2010

Mardy Diary writes: Think Town are shit? Not much money and would rather spend it on a Sky subscription? Think it's funny that the local club are going to get relegated to the Conference? Bought the latest Man Utd replica kit? Would buy a cheap ticket to watch Grimsby but raise expectations unrealistically then boo at the first sign of a tiny mistake? Then YOUR club needs YOU! Yes - much to the dismay of those season ticket holders who put the effort in week in and week out, the club, in its final desperate minutes, are giving out cheap tickets to the unwashed moaners again. And again. And again for the rest of the season. So if you found it hard enough sitting through the matches as your team plummeted towards the Conference without so much as a murmur, then prepare to step it down a notch. You too can now be accompanied at the match by your very own greasy, unintelligible, loser, co-commentator: "that number seven is shit, YOUR SHIT TOWN". Enjoy the match-time banter: "Fucking Blue Square Town, ha, YOUR SHIT". Partake in the support: "Going down, going down, going down... YOUR SHIT TOWN". And all in the comfortable knowledge that this here-today-down-the-pub-wanking-over-John-Terry-tomorrow cock end paid much less to get in than you did.

If you are that cock end, then here is a pre-emptive bit of 'banter': fuck off and die.