Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 22 July 2010

22 July 2010

Morning campers - your Guest Diarist here filling in for Armchair Diary who is giving his computer a bit of a bottoming. No news Thursday I bet you're thinking. Well, actually, there is news from Scotland on the Superb New Official Town web site.

Manager Woodses, still fuming a bit apparently after the rather dismal display the other night organised triple training for his squad yesterday. In a manner a bit akin to gorging yourself at an all-you-can-eat buffet he is so impressed with the training facilities (ooh it's a lovely setting he says) that he is determined to use them morning, noon and night.

And there is news from that Cod Almighty Scottish-based stalwart Kevin Graham who has written us this post debacle letter:

"Well, Tuesday. Due to my lateness and the insistence of a Stirling Albion supporting friend I didn't end up in the Grimsby end but I ended up sat right bang behind the away dug out. I was so close I could smell the ink from Mr Peacock's tattoos. Though disappointed that I had to sit next to the smug fans who can boast that they own their club when the game kicked off I wondered if I had got the best seat in the house as Albion battered the Grimsby back-line.

Would I see a Woodsesses rage? No, I just saw a man looking as perplexed as us and I questioned his man-management skills. You see, as the Mariners hoofed another ball aimlessly forward, or another pass went to an Albion player or out of play - which was a regular occurrence - Woodsesses just stared into the distance, arms folded, like a man looking out to sea or more likely thinking that if he looked long and hard enough then one of his misfiring Mariners would become Maradona. No shouting, no encouragement, no tactical direction... he was offering nothing.

His strange man-management technique was first noticed when Lewis Gobern - who was suffering from that time old failing of believing that he is a footballer before he is one - was substituted (his replacement Josh Fuller looked ok). There was no acknowledgement of the player as he left the field. He just stared into the distance. When the raft of substitutions happened in the second half this ignoring of the players as they left the field continued. There was no icy glare to the players being hooked.

Is he usually so detached from his playing staff or maybe like the team he just couldn't be bothered with the friendly? Anyway, while being disappointed with the result the sight of seeing Grimsby playing badly strangely felt right. If they had played like Brazil 1970 it would have felt like sleeping with your best friends wife."

Thanks for that Kevin - I think, on balance, that awful performance took place simply because the club knew they had a virgin fan. Supporting Town (and working for GTFC) is all about expectation management. And your future expectations, I fully believe, have been well and truly managed by that game.

Speaking to the Grimsby Telegraph Woodses has also revealed that he has a short list of candidates for the number two position and might appoint one of them before the end of next week. The article also quotes him as saying the Winterton game will be yoof based and the real Town side will emerge at some point during the Gainsborough and Halifax matches. And on that bombshell I'll leave you for the joys of a lunchtime showing of the new Toy story movie. See yer.