Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Friday 13 August 2010

13 August 2010

Your Guest Diarist returns in positive mood after a long dreamless nights sleep. A happy GM bunny lamb excited before the Conference slaughter. Ready to face the rest of an August that seems to have a Town match every forty eight hours right up to the Bank holiday. Six league games in sixteen days and I think there might be a cup game as well thrown in somewhere. Yikes, when it comes back it really arrives.

And to prove how good I feel I'll waste no more time gentle reader, in complimenting the Superb New Official Site which has been more than charitable in telling readers the injury news I mentioned yesterday for free. And for those rich enough to pay there is a good ten minute interview with Mr Woodses on that Mariner Player. Our Neil is a lot more comfortable talking to camera than the likes of Lord Buckley or that idiot Newell ever were. I still can't remember all the best things he said (see Dylan-themed Postbag). So in case you are dead skint I'm going to tell you what I remember.

Woodses recounted the tale of the Board meeting after the latest, worstest relegation, where it was decided that Town was a pissed-up toff in the gutter not an urchin doomed to grow up there. This decision translated in to positive action: a bigger squad who could cope with all these mid week matches in a short Conference season: more backroom staff and the introduction of sports science to make players fitter: the renovation of the training ground and finally, the establishment of a playing squad largely untainted and unscarred by failure whom Woods thought could play his brand of football. A brave set of investments especially with a rotten hangover and an embarrassing stain on your jeans.

Having more or less completely rebuilt the squad Woodses really had no alternative than to accept that this is his team. But he does it cheerfully and unreservedly. But unlike creepy Crawley who seem to be grabbing fistfuls of cash out of a large carrier bag and hurling it at random people Town's cash has not been spent ostentatiously. The need for more players on the payroll because of the compressed season makes a lot of sense. No-one is panic stricken because of the absence of Ademeno, Gobern and Atkinson. We have cover don't we? And a lovely view from the treadmill.

Finally the manager talked about the departure of Hegggaarty. A player who has been a fixture squad player for donkey's years it feels like. Woodses said that Heggs had topped the polls on pre-season fitness and had a great attitude. He'd brought him to the club and had a great regard for the lad. But he couldn't see him figuring much this season and felt that Hegggaarty needed to be playing football. We'll miss his Hegativity alright - good luck young man.

So tomorrow is Crawley away and the Cod Almighty pre-match fact file is a veritable mine(field) of information - useful, useless, comic and alcoholic. An extra sub-section on cuts and we could be running the Government as well. Perhaps the manager will read it hoping we've suggested a team and a formation too.

Woodses wise words were reprised on Look North last night where the man delicately explored his relationship with that recalcitrant crookster Steve Evans in an interview with the man-in-a-hurry-to-sign-off sports reporter Simon Clark. Mr Woods, who looks more and more (and more) like a nineteenth century shepherd, chose his words carefully about the fat barrow boy: "He's a colourful character who always draws attention to himself on and off the pitch" and something about mind games not working on those who turn their mind off to them, indicated firstly his intent to avoid libel, and secondly that it is just possible that his summer-holiday read was the men who stare at goats.

Tomorrow some of the lucky ones will be staring at Town, others will be staring at ceefax (or a TV programme where middle aged washed-up men watch football matches for you and tell you the score). Just remember we are psychic footsoldiers and our mission is to get Town back in the league - do your bit gentle reader and I'll do mine. See yer.