Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Tuesday 21 December 2010

21 December 2010

Thank you for queuing around the base of our gleaming Ivorian Tower. Our diaries are now running on a reduced timetable because of the frozen news items. With Mr Normal Diary roasting his chestnuts on a misplaced apostrophe, Mr Guest Diary wistfully roaming the Fens in search of the perfect sprout and Mardy Diary being truly, mardily and deeply disturbed by the rank hypocrisy and utter cant of the governing classes, it is left to me, that is I, Deviant Diary, to grit the path of Town knowledge. The stocks are low, we need a shipment soon, for even the local rag is reduced to speculative speculation about Town players who may be interesting proper football clubs, possibly, if they are. It could happen. Remember: the chances of anyone living on Mars are a million to one, they said.

The Mansfield game will officially be postponed sometime around 09:16:54 on Christmas Eve, rendering all that nonsense about tickets utter nonsense. What nonsense it was. Sometimes it feels like Town fans are viewed as cash cows. Well, we do moo a lot.

Let's chew some cud. Set your controls for the heart of mid-winter: the Southport, Kettering and Forest Green games have finally been rearranged. Ah, Kettering, the once tall poppies of the Conference with dreams of Gazza-led triumphs, cut down to mere stumps and scavenging for players from Barnstonworth. They tried to sign Golden Gordon last week. Michael Palin got the name for Ripping Yarns after travelling down the A15 you know. That's a true story, Kate.

A digression into the nether word of the non-League; pray why, good sir? It's a murky world out there, with snake oil salesman circling the dying, promising fishes and loaves. The latest dying swans are Kidderminster, who appear to have avoided a harrowing future. Mr Fentycon may be few things, but he hasn't been banned from running a company, only from swanning around the lanes of Lincolnshire in one of his two Jags.

And in late breaking news, it's... a bit cold. Chill out dudes, it's nearly Christmas.