Cod Almighty | Diary
Diary - Thursday 28 July 2011
28 July 2011
Friendlies here, friendlies there, there are friendlies bloody everywhere at the moment for Grimsby. I'm struggling to keep up. Town travelled to Barton last night to play the Barton Town Old Boys and they won and kept another clean sheet. I don't know much about the game although I do know Anthony 'Here, There, Everywhere' Elding scored twice, once from a penalty, so he's definitely going to score lots and lots next season and the ever relaxed Frankie Artus was impressive again although his second was a bit fluky. Is six-nil a good result? My thoughts on friendly results against lower opposition will be forever clouded following that 12-1 win against Winterton in the (last) relegation season. How many goals do you have to score against Winterton to guarantee a good season? There must be an equation; your Part-Time Diary will look into it.
It's not about the results though is it, no no; the friendlies are all about the performances. That's what we want at the moment; results can wait. So from the perspective of someone who didn't go to the game last night I can only assume that the performance must have been acceptable because we scored six goals and didn't let any in. There is also a pattern emerging - patterns, equations, must be that 'Code' thing I watched last night - whereby we are beating the smaller teams and losing to the bigger teams. So there seems to be a change in direction because for ages and ages we kept beating bigger teams and fucking things right up against smaller teams. Is this the overhaul we've been waiting for at Blundell Park? Have Shorty and Shouty finally done it? Well, they haven't done it yet but maybe things are moving in the right direction.
Talking of right directions, Rob Smith emailed yesterday to give us the heads-up on the latest in the superb new official website's impromptu midsummer April fool skits series with which they have been entertaining us with over the close season:
How have you missed this SNOS classic? Not content with sending us to Southport instead of Gainsborough (which incidentally was something I spotted for you) they have appeared to have moved Barton into Hull and Hull into North Yorkshire.
Now I know that councillors appear to be able to shift boundaries etc at times but surely moving Hull into North Yorkshire and Barton into Hull would have been an act which would have attracted a bit of publicity, perhaps even a public enquiry of discussion in Parliament. It appears not.
Perhaps that is why the club has failed miserably over the last ten years; there is no sense of direction and geographical awareness.
The scamps; what will they think of next eh? I didn't spot it myself I must admit, so thanks for bringing this to our attention, Rob.
Being a non-League team has its perks and this summer Grimsby are again bestowed with the dubious honour of 'owning' a horse in the Stewards Cup event, organised by the Conference league's money-swallowing sponsors. It's basically used as an aggressive marketing tool to encourage football fans to launch money in their direction while at the same time making gambling fun. Subtle. Anyway, Grimsby have drawn 'Tax Free' and if the horse wins then the club is awarded £2000 plus the value of a £100 bet on the horse, which is presumably a percentage of a fraction of the money that the sponsor will make out of all this.
The winner of the prize for the comical name goes to Lincoln City's 'Yer Woman' especially as the draw announcement comes a mere day after Lincoln's Ali Fuseini staged a one man walkout following some rough tackles. Fuseini left the pitch during Lincoln's friendly against Gainsborough 'in what could best be described as "a huff".' Yer woman.