Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 14 July 2011

14 July 2011

Have you ever had to go to work in the morning and the afternoon on the same day? It's hard to imagine, I know, but this is the fate befalling the playing staff of Grimsby Town over the last couple of weeks. To make matters worse they are soon to be required to work Saturdays as well. The superstar management pioneer partnership duo of the Shorter One and the Shoutier One have discovered that by making people do something more, you can make them better at it. They probably found out using those computer things that they're really good at.

So the players have been running and swimming and running and jumping and kicking and running for double sessions every day in a bid to make sure they can keep playing football for at least 90 minutes and stop converting comfortable wins into eye-gougingly frustrating draws in stoppage time, a habit that became a defining feature of the performances under Shorty and Shouty last season. Will it pay off in the long run and will we be able to beat some more of the part-time teams next season, who have to do their other jobs as well as run and swim and jump and kick? Your Part-Time Diary certainly hopes so.

But what about Frankie Artus? The Telegraph journalist's wet dream, who is seemingly in a permanent laid-back mood due to his pun-friendly first name, is struggling to find time for estate agents among his busy pre-season schedule and is currently living it up in the star-studded Millfields. Poor chap. Although he does seem to be bounding with enthusiasm for the new season. I wonder how long it will be before the new players are forced to Tell The Telegraph We've Not Been The Best Lately But We'll Get Better Soon, Honest. Sweepstake, anyone?

Friendlies are almost upon us now, and with them a chance to see some nearby league teams which we used to see all the time but don't any more since we became really shit. There was a time, about ten years ago, when Hull would have been pleased to come and play a friendly at Blundell Park - oh, the glory days - but now we're a last-minute replacement for Feyenoord so Barnsley can stretch their legs.

It's Rotherham at home on Saturday and one of the Millers' McRivals websites has decided to interview a Mariner to mark the occasion. I think they mean Mariners fan rather than an actual proper fisherman but it's good to see them getting excited about it. The potential fisherman/fan seems to be optimistic about next season and hopefully his faith will be rewarded. Mind you, he seems to have been optimistic about last season as well.

Pearson and Church are available and set to play on Saturday despite the protestations of that honest Boston chairman David Newton, who must feel he's had a raw deal since TopCon John settled for his managers last season. The rest of the squad is fit: I've not heard of any injuries for once, although Craig Disley did report via Twitter that he couldn't walk up the stairs because of those pesky double training sessions.

No pre-season Diary would be complete without the daily mention of that Connell fella. According to Shorty and Shouty there is no issue with Al and he's not sulking, so that's nice to know. Rumours also abound on an Arsenal blog of a possible Grimsby move for Nasri and with Connell being an Arsenal fan could there be a possible swap deal on the cards? We'll see, eh. Roll on Saturday.