Cod Almighty | Article
by Mat Hare
12 November 2003
Graham Hockless wishes he'd been born in Middlesbrough and that he'd joined Grimsby Town 18 seasons ago. He also wishes he held the record for appearances for the club because then he'd be John McDermott. I wish he was John McDermott too, in fact. You see, when those nice people at Cod Almighty asked me to write a player profile I agreed assuming that they would assign me Macca. But instead I got Hockless "because you look a bit like him". That may be true but I don't know much about him and I imagine that Macca would be a whole lot more fun to write about. I mean he's been around much longer than our Graham and is a Mariners legend. Mr Hockless, on the other hand, is some young whippersnapper who has hardly been on the scene five minutes. Oh well. I'll have to make do, I suppose.
Graham Hockless was born on 20 October 1982 in Hull, but we won't hold that against him. He is apparently only 5' 7" tall, which is exactly the same height as me, although he looks a lot bigger in the squad photo. Maybe they used some Lord Of The Rings style camera trickery or something. His preferred position is doggy style - sorry, midfield. Which is a relief because I was beginning to think he was sort of stalking me by looking like me and being the same height as me, but I prefer to play right-back.
Hockless signed for the Mariners as a trainee on 1 August 2001 and made his debut in the relegation season of 2002-03, featuring in the starting XI for the match away to Reading. I was at that match but I don't really remember him. I do remember Greg Young and Jake Sagare, who also started that match. His first goal for the club came in the 4-0 defeat of Chesterfield at Blundell Park, only his fourth appearance for the club. It was apparently a "delightful right-foot shot into the top corner". Nice one Hockers!
Before joining up with the Mariners, Graham did what all teachers tell you to do; he got some qualifications in case his chosen career didn't work out. After completing his basic schooling at Malet Lambert School in Hull he went on to attend Wilberforce College. There he participated in the Onside programme, a scheme that combines education and football. He did A-levels in PE, English language and biology while training with Hull City AFC, and it was while he was on this course that he was called up by England Schoolboys for a tour of Singapore and Malaysia. I must admit that I have no idea how he did in his A-levels but at the minute his future with the Mariners looks bright, so let's hope he doesn't need to fall back on his biology.