Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Wednesday 3 July 2013

3 July 2013

So, this morning I formed a new limited company. I'm looking for investors. If you're interested, and I'm sure you are, then let me know. I'm not entirely sure what the company does at the moment but that doesn't really matter. All we need to do (see, I'm so confident you'll join, I'm including you) is raise a large amount of capital for a one-off sponsorship deal. The only thing this company will do is purchase the naming rights for Blundell Park.

Sounds good doesn't it? According to Town's newly superb new official website, "exposure will not only be regional and national but global as the stadium becomes renamed and referred to at all times as your company name stadium". All times. By everyone, including fans, and failure to do so will result in a banning order/purchase of a season ticket. I hope you're in with me on this venture; it really will be in the club's best interests. What's the company called? Oh silly me, I should have mentioned that earlier. The company is called Fentibellend. The Fentibellend Stadium does have a ring to it. Remember, "referred to at all times". The Fentibellend Stadium. I'm a genius.

Our kid Too Good To Go Down has written a more balanced view on this debacle. I'm sure he's in on my/our venture though.

The fixtures are out! Woo! First game is at home at The Fentibellend Stadium against Aldershot where brothers will battle. We have the usual festive stuffing of Lincoln away on boxing day and then at The FBS on NYD. Macclesfield at home on the 28th in between the charades and coronation turkey.

Now, your London Diary is based down in London so I immediately look to games sarf of the border to head to, and we have some tasty ones this season. Welling away last year in the FA Trophy was a nice away day and so that'll be fun on 17 August. Small little ground on the A2 with quite possibly the nicest bacon butty I've had in years. They also have their own Welling FC lager in the bar which I highly recommend.

We visit Salisbury again, like we did two years ago, though this time in the league. Aldershot away is always a little adventure too, as you get to the away stand by going through a small forest. I still get flashbacks to the last time we were there, when Adam Proudlock had a penalty and converted it into said forest.

We're back at Barnet again to see those rose-tinted glasses but this year at their new ground The Hive – what a rubbish name, they wanna get that rebranded. The last time I was there our train broke down on the way, resulting in us missing four goals in the first half, then having to pay £16 for 45 minutes of football. Still, we got to see Adrian Forbes score that goal. The Yorkshire migrants among us have the exciting prospect of a trip to t' Halifax. By my calculations, we should be lifting the Conference trophy at home at the Fentibellend Stadium against Woking on 8 April. Yeah? Yeah. Ta ta for now.