Cod Almighty | Diary

You're not from Santa Monica, you're from Nunsthorpe

4 December 2013

Morning football lovers – it's your London diary here on a cold grey Wednesday in the capital. Last night our beloved football team beat Coalville in the FA Trophy in a hastily-arranged-Tuesday-night-freeze-your-knackers-off replay. It took three second-half goals from young 'un Dayle Southwell to beat the Leicestershire part-time club. Hurst opted to use a few more yoof lads than normal with Charlesworth, Humble, Winfarrah and Walker joining Southwell and Thanoj in the team. Isn't it nice when the team you support fields six youth products in the first team and we win a game, regardless of the opposition?

That's right – the CA diary has a glass, and it's half full. Don't worry, it'll be empty soon. Talking of glasses, we have Barnet next in t' Trophy. Clayton, empty your pocket and get ready to put Edgar back in it again. 

I was at the game on Saturday at Coalville. A lovely little humble ground in the middle of the countryside with a nice vocal following. Big shout out to the hundred or so away fans that travelled to Blundell Park last night on a cold Tuesday eve. You wouldn’t get that following from most Conference sides, so well done to you Coalville. We wish you all the best.

So, Grimsby is about to be put on the map again, this time in the form of a film called Grimsby. Apparently Sacha Baron Cohen's next film, set to be made by Paramount, will be about a British black ops agent who has to go on the run with his brother, apparently an obnoxious football hooligan from the north of England. And it seems that SBC's recent trip to Blundell Park has confirmed this hooligan is a Grimsby fan. Oh deep joy. If this film goes through it could be both bloody brilliant and bloody awful. Undoubtedly filming in the area could be brilliant for the economy and hopefully promoting local talent. But what is worrying is the connotations that come with it.

I'm not a fan of football hooliganism. It's childish. We're not at war with anyone. We're football clubs, who should love football and pies, not smacking each other in the face down a dark alleyway away from the feds. It would be brilliant if this film shows football hooligans in the way they should be shown: as idiots. But the thought of promoting the boo boys, the Burton boys, the pitch invaders, the racist hurlers, is ridiculous. Only time will tell. Obviously I'm going to apply to be an extra though. I'm not an idiot.