The Diary

Cod Almighty | Diary

Them ain't pure white cliffs, cliff

25 March 2015

Last night's trip to Dover saw quite possibly one of the stressful ends to a football match your London Diary has ever been a part of. I mean, I wasn't a part of it in the true sense of the meaning, as I wasn't playing on the pitch. But each and every one of the 300 travelling Town fans who were in that 'segregated for one night only' away end, felt that last-minute shot by Dover whistle by as much as James McKeown's kegs did. Cloth was touched.

I'm going to talk about last night's game, as I was there. I'm sure there will be a match report of sorts [um... - Ed.], but last night's win was by no means pretty. It will go down as one of those scrappy wins where one goal and a lot of hope will see us through to the end. Much like Man Utd's 1996 season, yeah? Yeah.

The best way to describe last night's performance was like a firework display but we only had one massive firework. We got to Dover, we lit the tip at six minutes, it went up, we went crazy, and for the next 84 minutes we waited nervously as those sparks descended, wondering if anyone had brought any more fireworks.

So we're now in a good place. We're third and only three points off top. Again, I am looking up, but Mark Dillerstone made a good point on t' Twitter last night. I'm still angry over that game at Altrincham. LOOK UP LADS, I'VE GOT VERTIGO.

 

I managed to persuade my new lady to come to Dover last night and quite frankly it made the game twice as nerve-wracking. It all started well with the goal, though I had to alert her that this isn't how it always happens. Then came the questions. Why is our goalkeeper dressed like Pikachu? Are they dancing on purpose? Was he angry when he tackled him? Why is everyone so stressed? So aside from that, the 'date' – and I am calling it a date – went well. She wants to come to another one soon but bemoaned the choice of pescatarian snacks at the game. Pah, wait 'til you get to Grimsby, love. Don't buy a hat any time soon though.

By scoring last night, Town managed to set a new club record. GET IN, THE TOWN. See you on Saturday in that there town outside of that there capital! UTM!

WOWOWO! Hold the internet, we've gone and got ourselves a new player. Just when you thought this week couldn't get any more exciting... we've signed young winger Jordan Chapell until the end of the season from Torquay, which takes our tally of wingers to four. His last appearance for the mid-table Devon team was a 5-1 defeat to Braintree (we've all been there). A little bit of research shows that he didn't want to be down on the south-west coast and expressed his views on wanting a move up north some time ago.

So, a disgruntled, attractive winger? I think Scott Neilson's locker is empty. Let's hope you like a CAMRA pub, pal. Welcome kidda. UTM (again).