Cod Almighty | Diary
Too many Florence Nightingales, not enough Robin Hoods
2 April 2015
Retro Diary writes: "One word," said George Kerr on Radio Humberside last Saturday, when asked why he thought Town would finish top of the division when they have never actually been at the summit. "Momentum." We know what he means, and the concept is deconstructed with characteristic aplomb for us this week by Middle-Aged Diary in his Tuesday missive.
A cynic might say that momentum is nothing more than a string of jammy wins that hasn't ended yet. In our case it must be slightly more than that. Player for player, we've got plenty of quality for the level we're at, and the loan signing of Ollie Palmer has had a pronounced effect on results. Apart from that, it's probably just a simple cocktail of confidence, spirit and luck. That's luck with injuries, certainly luck with refs, and basically just luck, remembering that if all teams were equal, winning streaks would still happen by chance.
Personally I think the steward at Forest Green who precipitated the inflatables day at Barnet also deserves a special mention. We owe that bobble-hatted wanker a good kicking, but we should possibly say a little thank you while we're doing it.
At the moment it feels like we'll never lose again and will have the division as good as wrapped up by Monday night. But we've watched enough football to know that it's very unlikely to be that simple. The two and a half thousand people who have bought Alfreton tickets have already beaten Gateshead in their minds, which is quite a leap of faith. If we don't win on Saturday, we could be packing their ground on Easter Monday merely to see Town go through the motions of winding down casually into a play-off spot. Even that, of course, wouldn't be the end of the world.
We have never traditionally either feared or disliked Gateshead, until they beat us in the play-off second leg in the rolling, airy acres of the International Stadium. That disaster and its accompanying pitch invasion have really soured the relationship, and since that day they have become a team I am very happy to stuff.
Gateshead were the first non-League team I ever saw beat Town, in 1975, when I was a week off my twelfth birthday. We lost 3-1 at home in the FA Cup first round, and I'll never forget the humiliation when it was mentioned as a giant-killing act on the six o'clock news.
At that time, and for decades to follow, I had no idea that Gateshead had ever been a League team, but older fans may remember them playing the 'proper' professional game – even beating us 7-1 in the third division (north) in 1954. Gateshead were well and truly diddled out of their league status in 1960 when they failed to gain re-election; Southport, who applied with them, survived despite it being their third consecutive re-election attempt. Gateshead were replaced in the league by Peterborough.
Actually to be fair, that was a different club. Gateshead have folded and reformed no fewer than three times since 1960, including once when a team from South Shields, eight miles away, moved in on vacant territory and started calling themselves Gateshead United, in what looks disconcertingly like franchise football 'lite'. Anyway, the current incarnation is testament to a community's dogged determination to have a football team however many times they prove they can't sustain one.
This season Gateshead have four of our exes. John Oster is the best player on the pitch in every match he plays. I still think of him as ours, and he has obliged us one last time by sustaining medial ligament damage. He is almost certainly out for Saturday's clash. Micky Cummins, part of surely the worst Town midfield ever, hasn't been getting a game, although it's approaching that time of the season where he would always pick up a bit because his contract was at stake.
Alex Rodman would undoubtedly still be a Town player if it hadn't been for the Hibs fiasco. He must know this and sorely regret it, although he can never say so. We've missed him on the right wing this season, and I fear his influence on Saturday. And finally, Michael Rankine, who never spent long with Town, but I remember him as being a good hard worker and well capable of a goal or two. He was subbed on Tuesday night against Dartford after 66 minutes.
Before Gateshead's last home game against Eastleigh, manager Gary Mills tried to recruit Newcastle and Sunderland fans to turn up and support the Heed. To me, asking local rivals for support indicates a lack of self-confidence, and if Town did it I'd be furious. It's one thing being minnows, but probably best not to make it so obvious that you know it. Anyway, it didn't help them because they lost, then drew on Tuesday at Dartford, and up in smoke went their season. So whether this is a good time to play them could be argued either way – myself, I think it could be worse.
If we do beat Gateshead, there will undoubtedly be a load of Town fans going to Alfreton without tickets. The maths of that situation make interesting reading. Their ground holds 3,600. We've sold 2,500 tickets, leaving 1,100 for them. Their biggest crowd so far this season was 916, and they average about 700. So we could be looking at a home end full of Town fans, and Alfreton fans locked out of their own ground.
In the old days, the police would have frogmarched the Town fans round to the right end, and packed them in a bit more tightly than was strictly allowed, just for the afternoon. But the police, who in these more benign times seem to have forgotten the ropes, can make some very strange decisions, and it could be chaos. If we don't beat Gateshead, of course, it won't be quite such an issue.
In today's Cleethorpes Chronicle, Chris Parker reports a Town fan walking back to the station after Saturday's Welling victory saying: "The stars are aligning." In the same issue Dep Doig warns against getting carried away, although it might be a bit too late for that. We're still waiting for the crash – but for two teams every year, the crash never comes.