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Cod Almighty | Diary

Ackkrington Stanley? Who are dey?

27 January 2016

I do hope Paul Hurst gets all of his shopping done this week, because he's not going to have much free time once we get into February, is he? March too is looking a little busy for that matter. Hold on, what's that you say? After Monday the shop shuts? For good? Come on Hursts! [stares at Twitter, repeatedly hitting F5]

If we win our next FA Trophy tie – and no disrespect to Havant & Waterlooville but we surely will win – then there will be another game to shoehorn in at the end of February, which means our home League game against Southport will need to be rescheduled. Win that game and it all gets a little hectic as both legs of the Trophy semi are scheduled for mid-March, meaning another two league games will need to move.

This of course means 13 games in 2 months could become 16 games. But just hold your horses a moment or two. Before we get all uppity about a "tinpot trophy" we would be better out of (and you know my view on that), take a look at this posted on Twitter by the good folk over at The Fishy:


That's right: Town will do better if we play eight games a month! It's the spirit of '98 and Sir Alan's wisdom will prevail; we've got this!

A ridiculously busy couple of months is one of those odd things about football. Especially in the Conference. Here we are with time on our hands midweek in January, and we have a free Tuesday next week too. But for pretty much the next two months after that we're going to be playing twice a week. In the Conference that just doesn't make much sense. Why don't we make hay when the sun is shining? Given how many of the clubs in this league play at grounds more suited to bog snorkelling or the 'both teams playing in brown' type of rugby which used to be shown on Grandstand when I was a lad, it would make sense to get a few more games out of the way in September and October, especially the Trophy.

Some of our peers in this league have of course adapted their games to cope with these conditions. In fact our local rivals Lincoln have dispensed with midfield play to such an extent that, bar the centre spot being needed for restarts, they could install a couple of rows of seats there.

But we're different. We persist with what purists might refer to a 'football' rather than 'hoofball'. Even on a pitch like Braintree's, which is ploughed rather than mowed before the weekend. It's our fondness for the beautiful game which is one of the best reasons for wanting out of this league, but also our insistence on doing it the right way: a cultured rather than agricultural approach, which might also have held us back. Still, this season will be different. We've got this.

So, aside from constantly refreshing a #GTFC Twitter search [hits F5 again] and an occasional furtive glance at the Fishy, what is there to keep us occupied midweek? Last night you could have followed Southport's game and groaned as they "did an Aswad" and allowed Forest Green to score in the last minute. Also last night you could have watched Cheltenham Town's u11s as they were dumped out of the Trophy by Oxford City. Stay classy, Mr Johnson. 

[F5, F5, F-fucking-5!]

In the absence of any positive transfer news I guess we should report who isn't joining us. One early target, French target man Armand Gnanduillet, has signed for Leyton Orient and former Mariner Michael Coulson seems to have ruled himself out with this interview for the York Press. "I am at York City in the Football League and I feel like I can play at this standard comfortably," says Michael. 

In response to that I say: "We are looking to get promoted, Mr Billy Big Boots, while your team look likely to be relegated. Give us a wave on your way down."

[One last time… F5!]

Nowt happening is there? OK then, that just leaves me to wish Scott Brown all the best. As expected, Scott has secured himself a contract to the end of the season with Accrington Stanley. You know, them off of the milk advert.

What does that say about the difference in standard between the Conference and the fourth division – that a midfielder not getting games at Blundell Park can step up a league? I dunno, probably not much. But good work all the same Scott, and we hope it works out for you. Maybe our paths will cross again next season? Read a brief exit interview with the Telegraph here.

It's Gateshead away this Saturday so have a great time if you're heading up there. Unlike Forest Green, the Heed aren't capping the away attendance, so fill your boots. Up the Mariners!