Cod Almighty | Diary

Whistle while you wait

3 November 2016

There are a few new prospects coming to the fore in the 40,000 Guineas Grimsby Manager Stakes, an unusual race in that no-one knows the distance it will be run over.

Graham Westley has had three separate spells managing Stevenage, so he's one for those who have been forced reluctantly to accept that Alan Buckley won't be going for his fourth term at Blundell Park. Elsewhere, his record could kindly be described as mediocre. His current club Newport have said they won't welcome an approach by Town, understandably as he's only been at Rodney Parade a month.

Danny Cowley – formerly of Braintree, now of Lincoln – is back near the head of the pack. Matt Dannatt insists this isn't just a click-bait story. However, Lincoln say no approach has been made to them. Would John Fenty poach the manager of another Lincolnshire club? Yes, we believe Matt.

Dave Jones hasn't managed a club since he was sacked by Sheffield Wednesday almost three years ago. He's one for those who think that if only Barry Conlon had been prepared to buy a flat in Meggies and take the pledge, Mike Newell would have steered us clear of non-League.

Some appointments fill you with foreboding (Nicky Law, anyone?). Established names don't usually fare too well either. (Not naming them, but the images of a Dutch defender playing in midfield and a cycling champion who as a left-back made Tony Gallimore look wholly ept have come into my head.) Usually you can't tell how it will turn out. We have all been there, and Cod Almighty has the T-shirts to prove it. Those 'Newell revolution' designs make excellent dishcloths. Buy now before the moths get them.

What we do seem to know is that Dave Moore will still be in charge at Bolton, and Middle-Aged Diary is looking forward to it. Let's change the subject.

Much more guessable is the identity of the Grimsby Town defender who has been "chosen as a National Citizen Service ambassador". If you didn't instantly say "Shaun Pearson", you really haven't been paying attention. The National Citizen Service provides opportunities for young people. That clicking you hear is the sound of the ears of Harry Clifton, Josh Venney and Max Wright twitching.

Alas the young people of Grimsby spurned opportunity last night when the youth team went down 2-0 at Scunthorpe in the FA Youth Cup. The Iron's youth team are managed by ex-Grimsby striker Tony Daws. Expect his odds in the Grimsby manager stakes to tumble.

When you have a friend who supports Town's opponents, you have no doubt played jinx tennis. I'm indebted to Cod Almighty co-founder Miles Moss for introducing me to the sport, which is usually a lot more fun than the match you are on your way to watch. Previewing the game, you serve with the fact that Grimsby haven't won at the opponents' ground in six matches. They return with their injury crisis. You try and wrong-foot them with the fact that Clive Mendonca hasn't scored for 14 years. And so on. The rally usually ends with one player pointing to the fact they've lost their last three games and the opponent triumphantly volleys: "We always lose to teams on losing streaks."

We're playing jinx tennis with Bolton. Neville Butt's must-read reminiscences inspired by Saturday's tie point out that we haven't beaten Wanderers in 16 attempts. However, the Bolton News says we are a "tough nut to crack", with just one Town defeat between 1965 and 1983.

It is perhaps just as well that football fans are not football players. Our heads would be so full of irrelevant negatives that we'd scarcely dare leave the dressing room.