The Diary

Cod Almighty | Diary

Stay on the road. Keep clear of the moors

30 November 2016

Transpennine Diary writes: On 18 March 2003, Danny Coyne, Macca, Paul Groves, Georges Santos, Tony Gallimore and Johnny Oster lined up against a Rotherham United side which included Paul Hurst, Curtis Woodhouse, Richie Barker and Guy Branston. Livvo came on in the 87th and Oster scored for us in the 90th. We won 1-0, but were relegated from the first division along with Sheffield Wednesday. That's all very nostalgic, I hear you say, but what's your point?

That was the last time we won a league game away in Yorkshire – 13 years and 9 months ago.

Including the 2002-03 season, we've played away 18 times in Yorkshire, lost 10 and drawn 7. We've conceded 28 goals and scored 11.

The worst away game in Yorkshire I've ever been to, by a country mile, was Halifax last year. Not only was the performance very poor, but the poison from some of the fans in the stands was horrendous. Hopefully that's behind us, but it got me to wondering why we have performed so badly.

Expectation and the consequent pressure on the players could be one explanation. We've not taken 3,000 up the A180 for a while, but as soon as our away following hits around 1,000, things seem to change. The more who travel, it seems, the worse it gets. Apart from Halifax Horribilis last year there was the damp squib at Guiseley, where the atmosphere was flatter than a pancake.

Our excellent away form in recent seasons may well support the numbers theory. In fact, the further we travel, the better the results. Look at our recent game at Plymouth. Fewer than 400 of us, and it was 90 minutes of noise and unequivocal support. Marcus Bignot was right to note recently that the players bear some responsibility for motivating the fans, but it's a two-way street. It's the same two-way street that has, in my opinion, led in part to our poor home form.

Once it's gone a bit sour or a bit flat, the next problem rears its head. When someone decides to shout (names changed to protect the innocent): "Brown, you're shit" or "Turner, you're a lazy bastard”, it sows a seed. In the people I watch games with, it stirs emotions varying from "please be quiet" to a few close shaves. Dartford and Telford spring to mind, where it nearly came to blows.

In other fans, maybe the ones who don't go to games that often, it sows a seed of doubt; it makes them less likely to get behind the team, and more likely to believe the negative PR from Big Gob.

If idiots want to fight with other idiots away from the ground, it doesn't in theory affect the team, but it does affect some of our supporters, many of whom are not used to the sort of undercurrents that were a regular feature in the 1980s

The other problem with Yorkshire games is the idiots. If idiots want to fight with other idiots away from the ground, it doesn't in theory affect the team, but it does affect some of our supporters, many of whom are not used to the sort of undercurrents that were a regular feature in the 1980s.  Idiots are a distraction from supporting the team. Grimsby's idiots are more attracted to Yorkshire away games than any other.

Something else that takes the edge off our trips into Yorkshire is overzealous, overstaffed and/or inept authorities.  Why is the Doncaster game a 12:30 kick-off? Because they don't want things to kick off. The local pubs will be closed pre-match apparently, but if and when a few hundred idiots decide to meet up in the town centre afterwards it'll detract from what could be a great day.

I'd hazard a guess that were it 5:30 when they arrive back at the station, they'd be much keener to head back to Cleethorpes for their Xmas night out. When I arrived at Halifax station last year there were about 70 police officers waiting. When I arrived at the ground it looked like a film set for the Poll Tax riots. The police have a difficult act to balance but it can add an unpleasant tension to the day.

Then there are the trains. Not only have they banned mulled wine on the journey to Donny, but apparently they won't be adding any extra carriages for the big day out. It's hard work to be Happy Christmas Mariner in Yorkshire. This sort of stuff just makes fans grumpy.

There always seems to be something to remember about a Town game in Yorkshire, other than the football. In the 1980s Town fans were bombarded with loose concrete on the terrace at Valley Parade. One boxing day I was very disappointed to arrive at Cleethorpes station to see a 12-carriage football special ready for a trip to Hillsborough, only to hear that the game had been called off at the last minute.

The other Yorkshire teams we haven't beaten away in the last 13 years are Wednesday, Sheffield United, Bradford, Barnsley and York. In five of those seasons there wasn't a single Yorkshire team in our division. But it wasn't always that way. Look at this beauty. Six glorious Yorkshire derbies. Guess the year and can you beat six?

League table with six Yorkshire derbies

Maybe we take these Yorkshire derbies too seriously? Anyway, until Lord Bignot leads us over the Trent and into battle, I'll leave the subject of Yorkshire with a piece of trivia. Do you know why people from Yorkshire are nicknamed "comforts" in Cleethorpes? If not, ask a Meggie.

Finally in other news, there was a little bit of Ivano going on at Fratton Park last Saturday…

Portsmouth fans on Facebook discuss their players falling out

Let's hope they've still got their handbags out a week on Saturday. It wouldn't have happened in Ben Davies's day.

Meanwhile, it's late April fools' day in Barnet with the Daily Mail reporting a £250k bid for Omar. The non-chairman has described it as "derisory".