Cod Almighty | Match Stats

Saturday 9 December 2017

Division 4

Grimsby Town 1 Rose (39)

Forest Green Rovers 0

Attendance: 4396 (38 away fans)

Everyone wants to have a selfie with Siriki Dembele before he leaves. It's the only explanation I can find for him being top of the world, ma.

The wretched second half rather undermines the claims of Summerfield, who subsided into last season's sloppy shanker. But hey, why not laud the next penalty king for being thoroughly unobtrusively, uncomplicatedly adequate: Ben Davies.

Sam has taken the last one and we've got Ben as well so there was a bit of confusion but that's changed now, it's gonna be Ben.

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"I was promised by the Professional Game Match Officials Limited today an experienced, confident referee that would make no contentious issues, but that's not what we got."

The berk was irked for "only one person beat us today". Yeah, look in the mirror boy.

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We are the Forest Green Deconstruction Society. God save Donald Duck, vaudeville and variety.

Town walked all over the walking dead until the very second the ball entered the net. Then? What have we got? Nothing.

An utterly wretched, miserable, small-minded, tactically timid non-performance after the fortieth minute. The players went rogue when they crossed the half way line, nobody passed and nobody looked fit enough to last 90 minutes.

And then we had the continuing story of the cornerboys; everyone back against ten men. Slade is just trolling us now.

An easy win that wasn't as easy as it should have been.

Forest Green, you're not our favourite waste of time.

Meaningless and ridiculous, they were timewasting from the moment they hit the M180 and lost the game through their own tactical cynicism. They're just not good enough to play total football - Luton could get double figures against such slow building lightweights.

How the heck did Doidge manage to score any at all this year? They didn't attack when there was numerical parity. Oh the irony that these Eco-power warriors just lacked power.

That these hooped hopefuls almost pinched a point was entirely down to Town's doziness and bizarre second half tactics. The Fruitymen look what they are – a non-League team timewasting above their weight. They'll be back where they belong.

United in exasperation at the lack of inspiration and post goal deterioration.

Mr C Boyeson

We are the Custard Pie Appreciation Consortium, very fond of penalties and all those who award them. The Fruitless Foresters managed to make the Hullite hate 'em within the first 30 minutes, so regional solidarity won out in the end. God bless Boyeson for atoning for sins of the past: 8.888

Town pruned a hedge and went home for tea.

In a word: baubles