Cod Almighty | Diary
It will never finally be decided who has won the football
7 December 2018
Football is never won. Clubs can win leagues, cups and championships, but the sport just goes on and on. It's a well-shared sketch from a well-known show, but the thing that makes Mitchell and Webb’s Sky Sports parody so funny is that it shares a truth that the broadcaster never really acknowledges.
Yes, there are big teams and big moments that deserve big graphics to amplify the sporting event. But, you know, it’s just a game. It's just a season. Someone will win, someone will lose, and then it all starts again – often no sooner than the names have been etched onto the trophies.
Your West Yorkshire Diary isn’t normally this philosophical on a Friday but I stopped drinking a few years ago because it got boring and I replaced alcohol with caffeine. What that means is that I now quaff the odd energy drink to satisfy the hyperactive teenager inside of me. You know – the one that wants to stay up late, play Football Manager and laugh at Ade Edmonson stapling Rik Mayall's finger to a table in the Christmas episode of Bottom, even though I've seen it, like, 43 times.
Football is in a constant state of flux; movement through the leagues is relatively fluid, and so it seems difficult – nigh-on impossible – to determine a 'natural' position for Grimsby Town. We'll base a lot of our judgment on history, but history shows that we've never really stayed still. I can't remember the fact off hand, but I'm sure there's only one other club that has moved between leagues more often than us.
There are those who believe that we belong in the second tier, where we spent many happy years throughout the 1990s and early 2000s. There are those who accept that football has changed and see us sitting mid-table in the third tier, given our attendances, and look to other clubs of similar stature to prove that point.
But let's face facts. This is our 15th consecutive season outside of the top three divisions of English football. Maybe we should accept that we are fourth division also-rans, hamstrung by a majority shareholder intent on getting money back that he frittered away on his own misjudgments. There's nothing wrong with ambition – and even if we get ourselves back to where we were before the Fenty days, I'd expect us to fall back down again sooner or later because that’s just the nature of football.
It's this macro view of football that helps me keep things in perspective. Win or lose tomorrow against Cheltenham, the season will continue and we'll adjust our expectations for our back-to-back home matches against Swindon and Notts County. Tomorrow is just another game in the club's ongoing 140-year journey and, as just like every single match that has come before it, we'll head into it hoping for a win.
It's just our luck, of course, that Cheltenham have also found some form. Manager Michael Duff was nominated for the division's Manager of the Month award having changed the team's style of play while they were in the bottom two. There was no disgrace in losing to Accrington in the FA Cup last weekend, and who knows how seriously they took their midweek 1-1 draw with Newport in the Rated People Trophy. But, before that, there were wins in the league against Newport and fellow strugglers Notts County. Their recent 4-1 defeat at in-form Bury is the only blot on the Robins' recent copybook.
As for the Mariners, we'll continue to be without the services of Hall-Johnson, Famewo and Whitehouse so it's very much "as you were" in terms of player availability. One of the things we've all craved for a while now is a settled team – or at least a settled squad – and things do appear to be settling down. Jolley appears keen to keep those on the periphery of the squad match fit, hence Hooper's loan to Bromley. And while his interview on iFollow wasn't particularly revealing, he also comes across as a man who's feeling settled in his role.
Instead of Harry Pell winding us up with his theatrics tomorrow, we can expect former players Chris Clements and Sam Jones to give us a few headaches. Clements had a reputation for letting games drift by him, but four goals in sixteen appearances isn't a bad return for a central midfielder – and his abilities went up in my estimation once I knew Slade didn't rate him.
Jones, on the other hand, scored 13 times in a Mariners shirt and I was sad to see him shipped out last January as I thought he had a knack of popping up with a goal without really being involved in games.
As two Bignot signings, they sum up the Bignot era quite well. Both technically talented, both contributed to the team with goals and creativity, yet both never really convinced the fans as they'd be in and out of the team and would often put in the kind of invisible performances that Stuart Campbell would've been proud of. I'd be more than happy for them to let the game drift by them tomorrow.
It's a long bugger of a trip, so if you're travelling to Whaddon Road I hope you get an enjoyable day out.
And that we win the football.
UTM!