Cod Almighty | Diary
We are just an island and we're absolutely fucked
29 March 2019
Today was meant to be the day this country left the EU. As a nation with a long history of muscling in on other people's turf and imposing our rule I find it strange that we now want to leave a union in which we had great influence to soon have none because immigrants. Trivialising the issue much? You bet. Just like the Leave campaign did.
The power of the remaining EU member states will be far greater than anything we'll have (or be) on our own. Our empire is no more. Despite what the popular bank advert says, we are just an island and we won't be part of something much bigger for much longer. Sad times.
But let's not dwell on our economic future when there's football to discuss. I didn’t think the name, the place or the football team meant much to me at first, but Oldham has followed your West Yorkshire Diary around a bit over the years and given me a mixture of happy and sad memories.
Nothing epitomises the topsy-turvy nature of our relationship more than the 1996-7 meetings when the Latics beat us 3-0 at Blundell Park (in what proved to be Brian Laws’ last game in charge) before we beat them at Boundary Park by the same scoreline in a season that ultimately saw both sides relegated.
The funny thing was, earlier in the season, the two teams had met each other in the first round of the League Cup when the Mariners had won 1-0 away in the first leg but lost 1-0 at home in the second leg. Only the reliable Clive Mendonca missed his spot kick in the shoot-out.
As fate would have it, the two clubs were once again paired together in the first round of the League Cup the following season. After Town lost the first leg 1-0 at Oldham we bucked the trend of reversing scorelines by absolutely battering them in the second leg at home. Jack Lester scored a nine-minute hat-trick in a 5-0 thrashing that sparked a memorable cup run in which we knocked out Sheffield Wednesday and holders Leicester City before losing to Liverpool in the fourth round.
Our league meetings in 1997-98 are no reflection whatsoever on our wider achievements that season. Oldham, bizarrely, were the only team to do the double over us in what was possibly our most successful season of the modern era. Our 2-0 defeat at Boundary Park in October checked our progress up the league table at the time, and our 2-0 defeat on the final day of the season will probably be remembered more for Bruce Grobelaar’s performance between the sticks as the game itself was a dead rubber given we’d assured our place in the play-offs the week before.
Due to our promotion that season, we didn’t meet Oldham again until we were rubbish enough to re-join them – for one solitary season – in 2003-04. I’ll remember our 3-3 home draw on Boxing Day for a couple of reasons – namely, for the performances of the Latics’ strike pair Calvin Zola and Jermaine Johnson, whose power and pace that day absolutely tore us apart. That said, we played the majority of the match with ten men after Tony Crane’s arse got him sent off in the first 20 minutes.
It was the game that got me really excited about the signing of Danny Boshell that followed a couple of seasons later because he absolutely ran the show that day. Six goals were scored and five were of the highest quality. How we emerged from that contest with a point is anyone’s guess. I think Oldham hit the woodwork three or four times, in addition to their three goals.
The reverse fixture that season wasn’t 3-3, as many Town fans will be able to recall. Indeed, it featured six goals, but they all came from Oldham. Scott Vernon – yes, he who scored four goals for the Mariners during his two years at the club – scored three goals against us inside 36 first half minutes. When half time arrived, the Mariners were losing 5-0 and were also down to ten men as Mike Edwards had been given his marching orders. Player/manager Paul Groves subbed himself off – to be replaced by Simon Ford – and we never saw Michael Boulding in a black and white shirt again.
If that game wasn’t already written into my memory with permanent marker, it was then branded onto my brain because it was also the day my grandad died. We were very close – it was he who used to take me to reserve games on Tuesday nights after school – so when I woke up that morning and was told he was taking in his last breaths at hospital, I naturally didn’t want to go to the match. But my parents insisted that I did because he was a Grimsby fan and he’d have wanted me to go – and not remember him for being the frail old man in a hospital bed.
And so, on a boisterous train out of Grimsby Town station, I received a call from my parents to say he’d passed away and I dealt with my grief by reminding myself that what I was doing was what my grandad had done many times himself, many years ago. The Mariners’ performance was so bad that it actually took my mind off something I thought I’d never escape.
I learnt a lot that day. Football is like a family heirloom. My grandad’s not here today but Grimsby Town is. The club is something we both share, dead and alive. It runs through our family, and that brought me comfort while I was watching us wilt that day. It still brings me comfort now. Proud of my heritage; proud of my family; proud to be GTFC.
Back to tomorrow. Given the Latics won 3-0 at Blundell Park, what are the chances of Town reversing that scoreline at Boundary Park? The result is secondary. It’d be great to win 3-0 – or to win at all – but what’s most important is that we have a football club that brings us together and keeps us together, like one big family (won't mention the EU here). And long may that continue. GTFC is something I’ll introduce my son to, when the time is right, and that’ll give me more pleasure than any solitary victory could.
If you’re going tomorrow, enjoy the match and UTM!