Cod Almighty | Diary

I'd rather listen to Thin Lizzy-o

17 September 2019

I'll be honest: when I first became aware of LinkedIn, I didn't expect it to be successful at all. I mean if there's one thing more hellish than Facebook, surely that would be a version of Facebook all about work. A few years down the line, though, here we are – LinkedIn has been bought by Microsoft and has 630 million members, while your original/regular Diary is still wearing socks with holes in the toes.

Last week I saw something about LinkedIn's new strategy to extend its reach from people like me, who sit at a desk all day, to people who do actual proper work. The network had, interestingly, chosen to base this campaign on the town of Grimsby. What I didn't realise was that this would also involve Grimsby Town. Which was a bit of an oversight on my part, really, now I come to think of it.

It's kind of funny that the superb new official website has just copied and pasted LinkedIn's universal press release, so that it's saying "the North East Lincolnshire coastal town of Grimsby" to people who already have possibly at least a vague awareness of where Grimsby is. But that's just nit-picking. There's probably not much to quibble about with this initiative, which actually looks kind of decent, so well done to our football club for getting on board.

A Cambridge degree in economics wasn't wasted on Michael Jolley, who has pointed out that while free-spending Salford City have only won once in eight league games so far this season, they have only lost twice, and this means they're not easy to beat. At the same time, as he looks to this evening and Town's first ever meeting with the heavily bankrolled Mancunians, the manager suggests rotation of his squad because they've been playing a lot of games.

My wild guess is that Harry Clifton will come in to midfield to replace Elliot Hewitt, who will revert to full-back at the expense of Liam Gibson. Even wilder, Max Wright will return to the bench as Jordan Cook is given a chance up front, while Matt Green, too, will be among the subs after recovering from the lurgy. I could have used one of those squad predictor graphic creator things to tell you that, but they are yet to provide a functionality which lets you include the word 'lurgy'.

Grimsby Town Women will play their next game at Blundell Park. The new side are mostly based at whatever daft name Wintringham school has these days but will switch to the grandiose environs of BP for a certain number of games, starting on Sunday 29 September, when Barton United will be the visitors. It's only £2 to get in, the team has a 100 per cent record so far, and the Players' Lounge is open for a pint. Can't say fairer than that.

Ticket sales for the men's trip to Chelsea next week in the cup have passed 3,000, which is bloody good for a Wednesday night in that London. Apparently, and perhaps surprisingly, the home sections are all sold out, which is also bloody good for a Wednesday night in that London. I expect the Chelsea fans who don't realise we played them regularly in league games in the early 80s will be all like what is a Grimsby lol we don't know any of your players, which is fine because since I grew profoundly bored of watching Premier League highlights on telly I don't know any of their players either.

Town's youth team lost 2-0 to their Scunthorpe counterparts at the weekend, which is a shame if you're a fan of the Mariners, but one of Scunthorpe's goals was scored by a lad called Finley Shrimpton, which is wonderful if you're a fan of excellent names. You've got to hope he ends up playing for England. Or Billingham Synthonia.

And if you still need more, there's a touching interview with former GTFC tryer Nick Hegarty on some website in Australia. Now coach at semi-pro side Hume City, your lad is about to take them to a cup final, prompting wistful reminiscences of his Wembley appearance for the Mariners in the final of the 2008 Football League Trophy. Give it a read and add some hegativity to your afternoon.