Cod Almighty | Diary
"We left a starfish in your starfish"
23 July 2020
BOTB diary has been thinking about the way world events have an effect on which views are socially acceptable and which aren't. For example, many think Brexit has brought racism out of the dusty cupboard of wickedness and into everyday conversation. I was trying not to use the word "emboldened" but I've already realised it is inevitable, so I'm going to use it all the time now. Here we go. Brexit has emboldened racists as has the mere existence of Nigel Farage.
More disturbingly, the promotion of Leeds United to the top division seems to have emboldened members of a shady, immoral and perverse group of people who I have always found utterly contemptible. I'm talking, of course, about Leeds United supporters from Grimsby.
I always knew there was such a thing as Grimsby Whites. I pictured them as a group of skulking, freakish, possibly disfigured individuals who crawled out of Grimsby in an unmarked van with their Leeds scarves tucked under their shirts, waiting until they were safely clear of the town before they dared wave their odious tokens of subservience. I actually once knew one Leeds fan in person, who seemed on the surface quite reasonable in some respects. I remember giving him a cup of tea – which he seemed to enjoy - and asking him to explain his world view. He didn't have a coherent one, of course. What came out of his mouth was cultish mumbo-jumbo. It was like listening to Charles Manson explaining his obsession with The Beatles.
We all know people from Grimsby who support Liverpool or Manchester United. Not just children as you might expect, but grown adults. I've always seen these folks as harmless simpletons who have yet to face the complexities of maturity, retreating into a childish world of Ryan Giggs posters, or imagining themselves to be Scousers so they'd have a cool accent and could stand on the Kop singing "You'll never Walk Alone" out of tune. (Note to young readers – Scousers went through a period of being hip, or cool, or gear, or sick, or whatever you say these days). But Leeds fans are something else. Being a Leeds fan is like looking at a glorious buffet set out for a minor royal's wedding reception and choosing the coleslaw.
Since the horror of Leeds's promotion, these freaks are thronging the streets. Actually, no, they aren't, thankfully, but they are present in small numbers wherever I go. I play a lot of old man's football and suddenly Leeds fans are shouting to each other, unashamed, across public spaces. They are posting messages on Facebook for all to see. They are wearing Leeds United scarves in Tesco. They are emboldened.
We have to get GTFC back and playing as this situation cannot be left to fester. The longer we don't exist and Leeds do, the more chance there is of the impressionable young joining this sinister cult. Imagine being a young man or woman, friendless, without qualifications, with no hope of a job due to your utter cluelessness, holding a grudge against a world that seems to have no need for duffers like yourself. On the TV you see a team in pure angelic white holding trophies aloft, a team just a couple of hours down the motorway from your home. Who would not be tempted? Well, I wouldn't, because I've got a soul. But some will, and they will join the barbaric legion of evil, lost to humanity forever.
When ever anyone asks "whatever happened to white dog dirt?" most of us know the correct response. We must teach it to the next generation. The alternative is too gruesome to contemplate.