Cod Almighty | Postbag
Postbag: the college years
23 September 2004
Hello. Today's postbag is dedicated to Russ Meyer and his wonderful soft-core porn flicks.Email postbag@codalmighty.com with anything. Anything at all
Twat
Could you tell Matt Hare to moderate his language please?
from The Anti-Swearing League
Letters Ed responds: I'll tell you this for free: spelling his name with double 't' is going to really get him swearing this week
L JOHNSON TWO-CLUB SONGWRITING SCANDAL
I have just played a few of my other footy 45s and discovered a potential scandal... 'Up The Mariners' was written by the same L A Johnson who wrote a Notts Forest song called 'Come On The Forest' by 'The Fans', also in the 1978-79 period. Musical mercenary?
from Ian Jackson
Macc lad
As an exile now living in Macclesfield this was the first time I had seen Town play since 1971-72 (yes, Mr McM was in charge). Once the players are formally introduced to each other they will perform but until there is some consistency they will struggle. I have seen Macc a few times this season and Brian Horton et al continue to perform minor miracles with minimal resources and abysmal crowds (only 2,128 on Saturday). Town can do better, their fans deserve it.
I had a miserable weekend taunted by the locals but whatever happens on the pitch or off it the first result I always look for is Town's. May the season pick up and Town get revenge on Boxing Day.
from Denis Zitman
Inacrurateute
Re: tips. Of all the words Andy could get wrong he has to choose accuracy, oh dear.
from Mat
We are ace
Just searched the web for other electronic football 'fanzines' and thought I would just comment that Cod Almighty is the the only one that:
a. doesn't take itself too seriously b. doesn't take GTFC too seriously c. is actually informative about the 'real' goings on at the club d. doesn't believe their club has a 'right' to be in a higher division, but know it will get there again one day e. is actually funny, and doesn't resort to boring old jokes/jibes about their supposed 'local rivals' (Forest/Derby, Villa/Wolves/WBA etc... it's just boring)
The only thing it seems to take seriously is the lack of standards in professional journalism. What a refreshing change.
from Ian Jackson
Letters Ed responds: Yeah, we are GRATE, aren't we?
Wheeler Barrow
That pic on the OS of the Aussie striker makes him look like a frickin hunchback. Also, Kirk Wheeler has joined Barrow on loan, and nobody spotted this headline?
from Miles Moss
I don't suppose I can
Don't suppose you could add a straightforward strapline along the lines of: "Clive Mendonca - Grimsby & Charlton centre-forward"? As a Charlton fan, I would certainly be buying one then.
from Simon Phillips
Letters Ed responds: No, but feel free to buy one and then write that on with a pen afterwards
The fox hunters of Freeman Street
Not related to the Mariners, but how many people in Grimsby and Cleethorpes fox hunt? Enough to warrant plastering the front page of today's GET with a picture of a fox hunt? What a load of absolute shit.
Still, seems to be more people at that bloodsport meet than at Blundell Park these days. Maybe they can add the area's fox hunt results into the local sports section of the Sports Telegraph.
from Tony Rogers
L JOHNSON IN OTHER TOWN SONG SHOCKER
Hi and many thanks for posting the 'Up The Mariners' song on Cod Almighty, I have been trying to get hold of a copy for the past few years since my vinyl copy became so scratched through overuse.
Here's something that may interest you: I am in the process of arranging Les Johnson (of the old band Good News) to rerecord his band's song 'See The Mariners' which was released back in 1985. I am just waiting for him to get back to me with his answer. Stuart Hall of Channel 7 has said that Grimsby College may be willing to donate their studio for the recording of it.
from Gary Spate
Letters Ed responds: Really? Tell us more Gary. No-one here has heard that song - could you send us a copy? And ask Les about that Forest song when you see him...
How old is Pete Green?
"'Up the Mariners' is fondly remembered by the pre-GCSE generation as a classic of the genre." If mammary serves, the first diet of GCSEs were introduced in 1988, so just how old is brainiac, muso-poet, west midlands slacker Pete Green? From his Friday musings, the inference (or should that be implication?) is that he classes himself as a member of the O-level/CSE gang - but being in the fifth year and taking exams in June 1988 and O-levels are an oxymoron. Can we have some clarification on this matter?
from A pedantic porcine lout
Letters Ed responds: Pete says: "Living in the West Midlands ages you by two years biologically for each chronological year that passes; hence the discrepancy - which ought to balance out now that I have left that godforsaken region forever."
Parkinson's diseased
Concerning Mr Butcher's report of the recent Leyton Orient match and in particular, his comment regarding Andy Parkinson's biorhythms. I am a professor of biorhythms incidentally so I thought I'd chip in with my zwei pfennig-worth.
Looking at Andy's physical cycle for Saturday it was in an upwards movement but was exactly at the neutral point between the active and inactive cycles. Strenuous exercise on Saturday was not a good idea. His emotional cycle peaked yesterday but it was consequently still very high at match time. This meant that he would have had no problems regarding other people and teamwork and would have found himself in great demand.
Today sees Andy's intellectual cycle peak. As a result on Saturday as this cycle increased he would have been able see things clearly and recognise mistakes early. Lumping all of this together, we can explain Andy's less than impressive performance on Saturday. Although close to the top of his game mentally and in almost total harmony with team-mates his body just wasn't up to it. He wasn't able to deliver what we wanted.
Incidentally Andy's physical cycle will be higher and rising tomorrow for Charlton's visit to Blundell Park. His intellectual and emotional cycles will be in decline but still high. As a consequence we should expect a great performance from him.
from Herr Doktor Unterseite
Leeds aren't very nice
Looked at the websites for all the clubs connected to Brian Clough (Middleborough, Hartlepool, Derby, Leeds and Forest). Just out of interest regarding a tribute or mention of his passing, which club doesn't mention the news as of 4:10pm on Monday 20 September...?
Answers on a postcard... or just say Leeds United. Not very charitable of them, or just a slow webmaster - which do you think?
Forgot Brighton and Hove Albion, but they manage a little tribute. Brief spell at Sunderland as a player as well: their site mentions him. I'll stop now, but how those grudges are held over the years, eh?
from Ian Jackson
A nice Charlton fan writes
Read your rough guide to us: informed, amusing, very kind too. Thank you, it was excellent. Don't bank on you NOT beating us tomorrow.
from Nigel of Lee
Ask the audience
I enjoyed reading Ian Poulter's article about the new scheme at Blundell Park where fans can text their concerns about racism or violence to stewards. As the reporter that wrote the article, I would like to point out that the Grimsby Telegraph did indeed cover the story - it was fairly near the front of the paper within the news pages on Tuesday, August 31 (Page 5 - 'Please turn your phones on at match'). Upon checking the newspaper website, I realise the story is not on the online archive. However, I can assure you the newspaper was happy to work with the club and Grimsby police in publicising the Fone-a-Friend scheme.
from Phillip Norton, crime reporter, Grimsby Telegraph
Letters Ed responds: Thanks for that, Phillip. It's nice to get a response from the paper that doesn't CONTINUED ON PAGE 42
Another Town song?
What about 'We're The Mariners' by... oh, who are they?
from Steve Jennings
Letters Ed responds: Another song - does anyone out there have any other Town songs? Get in touch and we'll see if we can get them on the site
Another nice Charlton fan writes
What a fantastic profile of us. Witty, knowledgeable and spot on. We will always love Grimsby because you gave us Clive (well, sort of).
One thing you could have mentioned is the piscatorial connection. Our nickname is the Addicks - so-called because of haddock (don't ask).
from Chris Hickey
Letters Ed responds: But now you've made me curious...
Happy birthday Brad Quickfall
Not sure if this is too late but I'm a Charlton fan living in the Grimsby area and my boyfriend supports Town. So seeing as it's his birthday on Saturday I wish for an announcement to be made at tonight's game when Town play Charlton, to wish him happy birthday. If this is possible I would like the message to read: "happy birthday Brad Quickfall love Bex xxx sat all the way in the away end stand".
If this is possible I would be very grateful if it's read out at tonight's game.
from Bex Edgar
Letters Ed responds: Two things really, Bex. First of all, if you want to get anything done in a hurry, I'm really the last person you should speak to (just see how often this letters page gets done). Secondly, erm, you need to speak to the club about announcements at the match. I could've stood up and shouted it to him but I wasn't sure which stand he was in
There's loads of these nice Charlton fans
Re: rough guide. Very nice, thanks guys. You failed to mention our utterly dreadful recent performances in both Cups. But I am sure you are aware of them, and I have a feeling there may be another one, about three hours from now. Anyway, let's share a toast to Sir Clive, eh?
from Richard Hunt
Do you think Charlton have any horrible fans?
As an Addick it made me cry to read the Rough Guide to Charlton. Extremely well written and from listening to the match on the radio it sounded like you should have won. Good luck for the rest of the season.
from Paul Harvey
Look, here's another one. This is getting daft now
Hi. I've just found your website via a lead from http://charlton.blogspot.com. Excellent read, good, thoughtful and true comments on CAFC rather than the 'who the hell they are they' and an excellent site overall. It's good to read intelligent and well written stuff on football, it proves that despite the money men, cynicism and plastic supporters that the heart of our sport beats strong.
Keep up the good work - I'm going to add this site to my favourites and drop in from time to time. Lastly, good luck with the season.
from Jay
A nice BRIGHTON fan writes... but about Charlton
I've been directed to Cod Almighty for the first time, and what an excellent article you've put together on Charlton. You're right - how can you not have a sneaking affection for that club? My wife's a fan, I live in Greenwich, so we've spent many afternoons down there. I just really enjoyed your informed piece. And I'm a Brighton fan!
from Will
Letters Ed responds: What do you think to last season's rough guide to Brighton then?
50/50
I've just read the piece taken from the Telegraph about the Fone-a-Friend Scheme. Am I now to be booted out of BP just because some little shit thinks I'm a foul-mouthed wanker and is upset at me voicing my opinions to the bastard in the black? Can I get the little lad who sits in front of me thrown out because he occasionally stands on his seat?
Funniest of all was the comment of Chief of the Thought Police, Mr Rudrum: "The message is that we want a good atmosphere at Blundell Park." Maybe if you stopped carting people off for standing up or because you got a text that someone had stuck their chewing gum under their seat then we might get one, Mr Rudrum. Oh and by the way, Mr Rudrum, there's a group of people on row P of the Pontoon who sometimes write the truth about the club - perhaps we ought to check them out and then drown them in the urine-filled trough that acts as a toilet underneath the Pontoon.
from Mr B.L.Ackandwhite-Barmy