Cod Almighty | Postbag
Postbag: better late than never
10 October 2005
Hello. Running a bit late with this one due to the annoyance of work deadlines. Cuh! Work eh, can't live with it, you can't live with it.Anyway, that's all in the past time to relax, be calm, chill out, do a letters page here and there. Send me your thoughts via the medium of interweb on postbag@codalmighty.com and I'll try to think of a half-decent title to put at the top of them. Seeya then.
Proser
Just read your match report on the Spurs game and wanted to commend the writer on his prose. This may come as a surprise from a disheartened Spurs man, but it was an excellent read, as is what I have seen of the website.
Call me a saddo if you like, but I stayed overnight in Grimsby (well, just outside it), and did not leave the area till I got hold of the Wednesday edition of the Grimsby Telegraph. So now, I've got the preview and the review.
Good luck against Newcastle. I'll be watching if I get a chance. Believe it or not, Spurs could go fourth IF they manage to beat Fulham on Monday. It certainly is a funny ole game. Good luck in your quest for promotion.
from Paul Smith
Dr Foster
I've just read a letter in your postbag re: grimsby fan in Gloucester. Wow! Is there another one? Does that make two of us? I have tried helplessly at times to find someone that goes to the games regularly from this neck of the woods. Wasn't really a problem when I lived in london, or Wales for some reason, but now
Well, my mail address is wozofgrimsby@yahoo.com. Keep up the good work lads.
p.s. any chance of a Futch or Chima t-shirt?
from Mark Worrall
If the gloves fit
OJ Fenty. Was he seen driving away very fast from the scene of his crime as well?
from Chris Jackson
What about the Owen?
Who remembers what happened on 18th November 1997? I wonder if Michael Owen does? I believe that was the day he scored his first professional hatrick. Before the excitement of France 98 and his burst on to the world scene he scored all three goals in a League Cup 4th round match against our beloved Mariners.
How strange the football fates can be. A lot of water has passed under the bridge for Mr Owen in the past eight years - Liverpool goals galore, England goals, bench-warming in Madrid (with goals), and now a return to England adorned, surprisingly, in the black and white stripes of Newcastle United. And on 26th October, in a League Cup third round tie, he will face Grimsby Town for the second time in his career. What odds another hatrick?
from Frank Jubilee
In profile
Last year, right, you did player profiles didn't you? How come you've not done any this year?
from Iggy McSwede
Letters Ed responds: Erm. Yes. Er, Si! Look! Player profiles Si!
Up the Mariner
Listen to 'Up the Mariners', right. The first line, Pisces bloke goes: "Up the Maaaa-riners, up the Mariners". Lovely. Nice sideburns, by the way, mate. Now, is it just me or does it sound like he leaves the S off the end after that and sing "up the Mariner" for the rest of the song? He does, doesn't he?
It may be that this is a conscious reversal of the Grimbarian name plural, which would have been applied, at the time the record was released, to Bobby 'Cummings' Cumming. My suspicion, however, is that Pisces were using the very same ten-bob GTFC microphone that is now employed in Mariners World interviews, and that the singer had to omit S sounds as far as possible to avoid his vocal coming out like "up the MaaaarinerssSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!"
from Pete Green
B-sides Pisces
I enjoyed the 'Up the Mariners' download - it's now my ringtone. Should cause much amusement to my peers here in Manchester. Any chance of mp3s of Mergers song/b-side released during the early 90's? I can't remember its name but it had a line "sink or swim we play to win" and had a funky rap in the middle "our formation is 424".
Also what happened to Illustrious GY?
from Henry's Cat
Letters Ed responds: If someone has a copy of this or any other GTFC song then we'll try and get them up on the site - copywrite restrictions permitting, of course
Kick in the Goolies
I live in Goole so am celebrating the joy of owning a Town shirt with 'Rowan' on the back. On Saturday he scored Gainsborough's second that earned them a 2-2 with Goole in the FA Cup. And then last night, in the replay, he scored Gainsborough's late winner in a 2-1. I work with a few Goole Town fans so am rubbing it in a bit. And with the Mariners playing so well I can't get it thrown back in my face. Which is nice.
from Ewan Kingsley
Club shopped
An intriguing and thought provoking article on the Town moving games to Friday nights. It strikes me there is a more obvious way of gauging how realistic the attendances from these games are. The club should run the same offers from those Friday night games for a Saturday match. The proof would be obvious.
You are very right about the club's approach to running their shop, for years making the fans feel that it is a 'dark art' none of us will understand, and we must unquestionably accept their decisions. So if anyone at the club reads this forum may be they will show the courage and strength to show an approach to Saturday games as positive as the one they have adopted for their Friday experiments. If, as they point out is the case for Friday games, more people turn up to support the Town then is anyone the loser?
This is an interesting situation you have highlighted and one I am glad you have thought about. Keep up the good work and up the Town.
from Ian Popplewell
Unchartered territory
I've just come across Andy Holt's cool charts looking at this season versus last season. Very interesting. But why don't you advertise stuff like this? Why leave it up to nosy, bored-at-work people like me to accidentally find it?
from Julian Budgy
Letters Ed responds: Ah, but isn't that half the fun Julian? It's like your own little dark and dirty secret.
Keeping up with the Jonesy
Any plans to make an all-action hero Rob Jones t- shirt?
from Kevin Curran
Letters Ed responds: Possibly. Maybe. Perhaps.
Nudge, nudge, wink, wink
I am still looking for a football supporter from each of the 92 league clubs for a photography project entitled 'Tribe: Class of 05/06' and I would really like to find a Grimsby supporter who stands out from the crowd.
My web site is www.lifesaball.co.uk which will give you more of an insight and my contact details. I really need a supporter from Grimsby, is there anyone who springs to mind?
from Zak Waters
Letters Ed responds: Anyone got a funny face? You know where to go
Slack on
I've just found your page of links to all things slacking. What a well hidden treasure! Have you thought of setting up a Cod Almighty Stick Cricket league?
from Dave Chambers
Letters Ed responds: Ooh. So. Very. Tempting.
and Fenty dancing
So Fenty screamed 'what about the orange!' whilst looking a complete and utter idiot on national TV - oh hang on - they may be on to something. By the way John, it was almost as funny as you stopping the trust having that page in the programme. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you. Anyway, I digress - he may be right.
We've had Marcel Cas, though his name is made for a part on Dream Team. We've had Menno Willems, we've even had Laurens Ten Van Removals. Now, alas, we have no orange influence. We sit proudly at the top of the table, have even started to play passing football (woah I need a sit down) - just think what might happen come May if we had some Orange in the team. A finisher along the lines of Van Basten, a midfielder with the trickery of Cruyff, another midfielder with Davids temperment (damn, Flemings gone - hurrah!). Or just someone named magnificently like Johnny Repp.
So there it is Fenty, the recipe for success. Forget trying to make yourself look even more stupid than the last time when the Geordies turn up, forget the pleeing of someone to come in and help financially (yeah right), forget the urging of supporters to turn up at BP, forget the walking in front of fans milking the applause (nothing to do with the above - I just don't buy it) - just go and splash the cash instead of hoarding it. Failing that, pay the bloody tax man and with small change go and dye Gritts hair orange or buy Super Rob some orange boots.
from Jase
Time bandits
Any of you boys got an official GTFC Fixtures 2005-2006 fold out thingie? Apparently Town are playing Rochdale at home on Sat 6th Dec and Bristol Rovers on Sat 10th Dec. Moving Saturday games to Friday nights is one thing, moving a Saturday to replace a Tuesday is just tampering with the fabric of time.
from Ryan Caldwell
Erm, a Dale?
In those Mariners World intros why does Dave Smith always go "we caught up with assistant manager", then pauses, closes his eyes for a second, before finishing "Graham Rodger"? Is he accessing his mental Soccerbase while he blinks, downloading from the Matrix, or just some sort of nervous tick?
And why does Dave Smith do the intros and 'Dale' is the one doing the interviews? Is 'Dale' a bodyless entity that we can't see? Or an imaginary character? If that's the case, it's only a matter of time before Mandy Mariner is asking the questions. Maybe this Dale is just too hideous for us to see but blessed with an eager querying mind - Dr Smithenstein's monster?
from Jamie Linton-Sparrow
Prawn sandwich eaters ignore Town
On the BBC website it says "Spurs have made a fine start to the new season, with boss Martin Jol leading them to third place in the Premiership behind Chelsea and Charlton." What about being dumped out of the League Cup? Does the League Cup not count? Even John Motson on Saturday's Match of the Day seemed to deem it irrelevant with Spurs "not losing their last four away games."
To make matters worse the Guardian's lower league round up a few weeks back neglected to note Town's elevation to the top spot but gave time to something midtabley. This week's round up is more concerned with Leyton Orient closing the gap at the top. Still, Leyton Orient probably have a higher proportion of fans who read that wannabe liberal nonsense than Town do.
from Marcus Dixon
Letters Ed responds: Gah! Don't worry too much Marcus, it's only a matter of time before the Premiership eats itself. We just have to patiently wait for it to happen
Harrassment for beginners
It's Friday. Are we getting a letters page today or what?
from Robert Juggert
Letters Ed responds: Erm. No.
Sounds of the Humber
From postbag 23rd September: "The other one? Er dunno Dave Boylen?"
That bloke on the left with the 'beard' is called Les Johnson. He used to own/run Humber Records when it was on Garibaldi street (I think that's where it was), off Freemo. Anyway, he also played drums for the Rumble Band for a while but dunno if he still does?
I moved to Mallorca two and a half years ago and so I've pretty much lost all touch with anything 'Grimsby'. It's so brilliant to see all the stuff here, especially the pieces about Grimsby not being in Yorkshire and Chapman's pond being bottomless (*eek!*). The Grimsby dictionary is a masterpiece - although you missed out 'pairpull' (purple). And last but not least (obviously) - the ongoing debacle on nunty and it's origin.
To be reminded of all these things, and therefore my upbringing (I'm 35) is a double-edged sword. I've been laughing out loud at work (the others in the office here are still wondering what could be so funny about that last web stats analysis report), and yet there's also a hint of sorrow when I realise certain things like:
- the fact that I'm probably never going to taste Marklews chippy again in my own home (I used to live on Humberstone Road - 7-ish doors down).
- the fact that I'm not going to get to Len Edwards butchers on park street on a Saturday morning for a steak pie
- I can't crap on about trying to get parked in Freshney Place on a Saturday lunchtime ("yes I KNOW we should have parked in asda and 'kin walked")
- not doing the Sunday lunchtime thing of playing snooker at the westlands club then down freemo for a pint in each pub (oh and lunch on the bar i.e. roasties/yorkshires/cheese/toast/black pudding/pizza/crisps, depending on the pub - result!)
- always promising myself I'd get up early to get down the docks one morning for some fresh haddock, only to never actually manage to do that
- about a thousand other things.
I do however have a great place to live, the sun shines lots, the food's great, the beer's cheap, I appear to be in the unofficial land-of-the-perfect-arse and I can still get back to the UK in about two hours.
As a footnote, y'know I always used to be taken to see the summer show at the pier for my birthday when I was a kid, followed by a posh meal at the Berni Inn in town. I'm sure that fit one from the Nolan Sisters winked at me when we went to see them - beat that if you can. Mind you, I also got a bit of a look from Rory of the Animal Kwackers so that's that story fucked innit?
Good work lads - you've done a cracking job.
from Ricardo
Letters Ed responds: Is there a competition to see who can write the longest letter to the postbag?