Cod Almighty | Diary

Forever Young

23 December 2021

Mr Target Demographic writes: Back again and the lack of football surrounding GTFC recently has unfortunately left my colleagues and me very little to write about. With each passing week it's getting tougher and tougher to write a full diary surrounding the context of Town. This could be a blessing in disguise, however, as our recent performances would make you want to rip up your page rather than write one. That is why I'm not going to try not to talk about football (I will fail) and instead I'm going to talk to about my 18th birthday.

Last Sunday was my 18th birthday! Hooray, my childhood has now expired and with my new-found adulthood I'm going to have to pay higher prices on trains, buses and for my season ticket at Blundell Park. It's not all bad though, is it? I've been told you can tell a lot about a person by whether or not they can remember their 18th birthday and I'm now part of the majority who cannot. Sure, I can remember the morning where I played football, we won 7-6 on penalties after a thrilling 2-2 draw in the cup and I can remember going down to the local for my first legal pint. However, when it comes to the evening it appears to blur all into one.

That is not to say I wasn't sensible - I was home at 7:30 for tea, which I can't really remember, but it doesn't matter because I saw it again the next morning. I'll spare you the masses of detail; just know the morning after my mouth was as dry as Gandhi’s flip flop alongside a brutal headache. Video evidence might suggest that I dodged a bullet by leaving earlier, as it appeared to dissolve into a karaoke bar and I can tell you for a fact, nobody wants to hear me sing.

I could continue today's diary and give my opinions on Town's appalling away form or how results "just aren't going our way" at the moment. While I'd agree both our losses at home weren't deserved and we matched them for quality, I'd rather save opening that kettle of fish for after the new year, for my mental sanity as I’m sure many of yours. That's why I'm going to leave you with just a simple message today. People can complain all they like about the Scotch eggs, but they do make the inevitable defeat easier to stomach, wouldn't you say?

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

UTM