Cod Almighty | Diary

Warning: contains Product Placements and forecasts of mild peril

8 February 2024

It may be pouring but it's a beautiful day. Today we can start homing in on Saturday's tussle with league leaders Stockport. And yes, your Guest Diarist has a little scoop. My intelligence agent, embedded in the heart of Grimsby suburbia, has unearthed a plot. It seems that a cohort of Main Stand dentists plan to protest by throwing Pringles at Dave Challinor at half time. What is it with this word cohort? I remember using it in O level Latin aeons ago but otherwise it was not a word that english people used, in my hearing anyway. Until they started saying it recently. All over the place. Politicians, radio presenters, the Chelsea womens manager. And now me. As Pete Green, much-missed member of the CA, err, cohort and great man of letters told me, language evolves in mysterious ways and never stands still. Me? I still don't get why gobsmacked replaced flabbergasted.

I saw Pringle play for us at Forest and he just glided through the game. It was a nil-niller but Martin was memorable. I was at the back of the Pontoon with dodgy eyesight when Challinor clattered him. I read somewhere last year that someone claimed it was not half as bad as we (and Carlton Palmer) thought.  Well, recollections may vary as they say. I try not to ever carry grudges but Challinor has Pringle tattoed on his forehead, and may he receive a crisp reminder at the weekend.

Anyroad, back to the big match build up. I think the dulcet tones of John Tondeur will be back talking the talk for ex-patriots and ne'er do wells like me. John is the only modern era football commentator who does not talk too much and is very much master of his art, so his return will be welcomed world wide. I took a look at the Stockport player names for John to get his false teeth around, something else in this world which is ever evolving. Connor Lemonheigh Evans is not named after a Mississippi blues singer I expect. But he is in-form and dangerous. Then there is the much-travelled Myles Hippolyte. He turned out for Scunny at one time, so tribal boo-boys take note. Their top scorer is Isaac Tanitoluwaloba Aduraoluwatimileyin Olaofe. Stick with Isaac John. Olaofe bullied us a bit in the away match. Our new-look defence will get a proper test this week. Things were better at Accrington but, like Salford, the opposition were not that hungry to score. Still a week on the training pitch and our lads should be raring to go.

So, that's enough for today. Let's hope we enjoy the game and keep result expectations realistic. They are top, but they get beaten now and again and we came fairly close last time. I am off to watch Sherlock Holmes on the the old persons channel, to listen to the rain sheeting down, and to idly peruse the delightfully named Kickass Softwear's range of undies. See yer.