Cod Almighty | Diary

A referee's assistant with a very big ego and a very small penis

12 March 2024

I'm not saying I was just a bit pissed off at Saturday's result but I have watched the Football League highlight show replaying the penalty incident frame by frame to see if I could see a genuine reason for the penalty being awarded against us. I really couldn't. The irritating commentary added later to the highlights show doesn't even mention that it was controversial. They are probably too cosy with the league.

"The side propping up the table needed a helping hand and got one from Danny Rose. The ref’s assistant on the far side spotted a handball from Rose. An ensuing consultation preceded the award of a lifeline to the basement battlers".

I know in my head that we should have scored at least one more and the 'penalty' decision would then have been academic, but we didn't. After the referee overruled the assistant earlier in the game and then that assistant refused to shake the ref's hand, I said to Mr Trentside "I hope that petulant behaviour doesn't come back to bite us later" but it did. He had to prove he was the big man and the referee was too weak to overrule him a second time. We now find out that the senior referees' coach has telephoned our manager and apologised. It really isn't good enough. Nothing will happen will it? We are down two points because of a man who was determined to be proved right. This happens far too often in the game.

There is something fundamentally wrong with officials who think they are so important. Whoever trains them is obviously imparting the wrong values and understanding of the game, coupled with far too little continuing development.

Looking into this and going down a PGMOL rabbit hole, apparently the organisation was formed in 2001 "to improve refereeing standards". They claim a total of 600 match officials comprise what is billed as a "highly skilled workforce". Dear lord. If this was a school, a council or something like a children's services department it would be in special measures by now. Having watched games abroad, admittedly not with the investment I have at Town games, it has always felt that the referee was there to ensure things ran smoothly and fairly. You would barely notice they were there. Something fundamentally needs to change in football officiating in this country.

The only positive was that we appeared to all agree with Artell's post-match interview and there's nothing like shared adversity to bring us together. Let's move on.

We have a game tonight and about the time this diary is published I will be making my way to sunny Cleethorpes. It's always sunny in my head. I will be there for a few days and am hoping for several things, firstly a point against franchise scum. That would be lovely but they are doing well and going for automatic promotion unfortunately. A point would be a good result. Our rivals near the bottom of the table also play: go Bradford, go Crewe. I would also have said "go Doncaster" but not for the first time this season, or even this week, Colchester have a waterlogged pitch.

I'm also hoping for a walk along the front for Wednesday's high tide, and persuading my mother to go out for some lunch and a bit of shopping in Hull. I will sacrifice the last two for results going our way. Hang in there Mariners.