Cod Almighty | Diary

You'll Never Fish Alone

5 April 2024

Firstly I must apologise. Just two weeks ago, in my March 22nd diary, whilst summing up the relegation dogfight, I wrote the following;

"I'm leaving Sutton out of it because even my concrete-blooded grey Grimsby pessimism can't see them overtaking us as they are fast running out of games."

Seriously, is it any wonder that supporting Grimsby Town eventually makes miserable, pessimistic old gits out of everyone? Sutton, having won five out of their first 38 games, have somehow managed to win their last four, thereby placing our beloved Stripeys firmly in the poo. Tomorrow Sutton play Stockport, who are four points clear at the top of the division. I wonder what's going to happen there?

And, with Town about to play a crucial game against Newport County, or 'The Pagnells' as they like to be known, what does the weather present us with? Storm Katherine, that's what, and it's going to be blowing a football-wrecking hoolie. Just what we need. We don't have any defenders who can clear it more than four yards to an opposition striker on the fairest of days, without the wind complicating matters.

This season feels like a novel by a bad writer in which every attempted plot twist just makes the ending more predictable. To misquote Tony Butcher, because I can't remember what it was he wrote exactly, we have no more stuffing to be knocked out of us. It's been horrible.

Did you read Guest Diary yesterday? It was very good. So good, in fact, it left me with nothing much to add. All I can say is this. There is still hope for the future, sayeth the Lord, because IF Katherine accidentally blows the ball into the Pagnell's net a couple of times tomorrow and Stockport manage to beat Sutton things will look better. I put IF in capitals because it's a big IF and I don't know how to write a bigger one.

The Pagnells sit in mid table having very little to play for, and in their last game they were beaten 4-0 by the Creepies and the Crawleys. Not that it really matters, since it's going to be very windy and anything could happen. After this we have two horrid looking away games at ridiculous overachievers and spa-washed Yorkies Harrogate Town and weedy and inconsistent but somehow successful Crewe Alexandra. Check the weather. We'll probably get a plague of frogs or something.

We're going to have to fight like buggery. Curtis showed us all how it could be done with a MOTM performance against Bradford. Passion. That's what we need, since we don't have much else. Can we stay up? I dunno. I might go to Peoples Park and bang my head against a tree because it's more fun than thinking about it.

On a brighter note, have you seen Michael Palin recently? When he was young he was a comedian who looked like a comedian. Then he travelled the world and now he looks like an explorer. Honestly. He's physically turned into Ranulph Fiennes. Ranulph is another example of how people with bizarre names start seeming like they have normal names after repeated exposure. See also Benedict Cumberbatch, Elon Musk, Manny Panther, The Edge.

Yes, I know, I'm changing the subject. You have to remind yourself that football isn't everything. All we can do tomorrow is walk through the storm, with hope in our hearts, and we'll never walk alone. Or something less Scouse and sentimental. Just turn up and cheer, that's all we can do. That's all we've ever done. Come on Town, it's not over yet.

UTFM