Cod Almighty | Diary

If you aren't in over your head, how do you know how tall you are?

14 October 2024

If this was 1999 and you were reading CEEFAX page 312 this opening sentence would read "Miss Guest Diary (hip) is out for at least two weeks and Deviant Diary is expected to fill in as resurgent Cod Almighty seek to maintain a fine run of diary form".

If this was 1999 you'd be worrying about the implications of a military coup in Pakistan and fretting that Australia would vote to be or not be a republic. That was the question then. The question now?

What flavour crisps is Cameron Gardner chasing in training? I have always thought at the back of my mind that it would be cheese and onion.

Or the question could be has the Grimsby Reaper struck again? How much longer will Calamity Karl Robinson last at League Two's favourite vanity case? Town's Proper League Two Win (© Big Dave) sees see-saw Salford muddling around the mundane middle again and the Paranoid Prat from the Peninsula 'Stadium' needs someone to show him the things in life he cannot find. Infamy, infamy they've all got it in for Raging Robbo who doesn't even swear at the officials!

Have you heard it yet? It's like a mafia gang statement. Honestly Gary, what the hell are they playing at?

Who cares for such fripperies, the question on everybody's lips is how long can we keep this going on? Town's current awayday aceness has gast many a flab, turned the tables on the Pontoon poo-pooers and Main Stand moaners (aka the Deriding Dentists) and turned the league table upside down as Town surge like Makofo onto the coattails of the play-offs. Repelling repulsively direct teams? As the man whose mojo is rising says, we're not built for that, really. But reality is chuckling in the face of theory and let us not lose sight of a statistical curiosity: Town have played five of their eleven games against one of the seven teams above them. In theory, after Walsall, things get easier.

In theory there are chickens in those eggs.

Don't mention the Walsall! The next question is: do we still carry the baggage of the battering by the Baggies' little brother? Ten months on and ten different starters, we've turned our wounds into wisdom, for character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. All we need now is for Town to continue to heed the wise words of Theodore Roosevelt: in any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.

Let's keep calm and carry on cracking on. More cheese and onion, Gromit?