Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 31 March 2003

31 March 2003

After the Diary fought Town's corner last week against an onslaught from the Grimsby Telegraph over the John Oster transfer saga, Mariners chairman Peter Furneaux weighs in with a rare public attack on the local rag. In what looked like a cynical attempt to turn fans against the club at the most critical stage of Town's relegation struggle, the Sheffield Wednesday-supporting Telegraph ran an inflammatory piece claiming that the Grimsby board were unwilling to fork out a small fee to keep Oster at Blundell Park. When the transfer collapsed on Thursday, though, it emerged that the player had agreed terms but was unwilling to risk playing in the second division next season. "There was a failure by the Telegraph to check the facts with us," says a rightly pissed-off Pete F. "Everybody at the club is very upset with the way the matter was handled by the Telegraph." A full statement from the chairman is to appear on Town's official site later today.

The chastened Telegraph wants to change the subject now, and does so by reporting that the playing contingent who are out of contract this summer could be facing big pay cuts if they are retained at all. The current deals of almost half the playing staff are due to expire in the close season, and the future of players like Tony Gallimore and Steve Livingstone will hang in the balance as the club cuts its cloth according to the fact that only 5,000 people care enough to go and watch them. "The reality is that some of those players will have to take a cut," says Paul Groves with a sigh.

Also in today's Telegraph is a nice little Stuart Campbell interview in which the increasingly visible midfielder plays down his personal ambitions to become leading scorer of the entire world, emphasising instead the need for togetherness, team spirit and lots of hugs as the Mariners approach the run-in that will decide their first division future. "You put your goals to one side at a time like this," insists the selfless Scotsman. "Everyone is marching together."

Similarly obsessed with matters military is the grandmother of Cod Almighty founder, retired media tart and new father Mr Simon Wilson. "I was reading in the paper yesterday that the Town game was called off due to the war," said Si's nan at the weekend. Her perplexed grandson requested further information. "Some players were called up," she explained. "For international matches," said Si, "not the army." I think she's from Scunthorpe, bless her.

And finally, the Diary has decided that it will no longer be carrying any news related to John Oster that is not also directly related to GTFC. I am sick of hearing what a great game he had for Wales, and I am deeply pissed off with the way he has treated our club, so sod him. The ungrateful little shit can do what he likes.